v50 Steam/Premium information for editors
- v50 information can now be added to pages in the main namespace. v0.47 information can still be found in the DF2014 namespace. See here for more details on the new versioning policy.
- Use this page to report any issues related to the migration.
This notice may be cached—the current version can be found here.
Editing Main Page/Quote Archive
Jump to navigation
Jump to search
Warning: You are not logged in.
Your IP address will be recorded in this page's edit history.
If you are creating a redirect to the current version's page, do not use any namespace. For example: use #REDIRECT [[Cat]], not #REDIRECT [[Main:Cat]] or #REDIRECT [[cv:Cat]]. See DF:Versions for more information.
The edit can be undone. Please check the comparison below to verify that this is what you want to do, and then save the changes below to finish undoing the edit.
Latest revision | Your text | ||
Line 1: | Line 1: | ||
− | + | {| style="margin: 0 auto; border-spacing: 1em" | |
− | Bob, Swordsman: Join me on my adventures! Joe, Mayor: I'd rather not. Joe, Mayor has bled to death. | + | | style="vertical-align: top; padding: 0" | |
+ | {{Quote Box|Bob, Swordsman: Join me on my adventures! Joe, Mayor: I'd rather not. Joe, Mayor has bled to death.}} | ||
+ | {{Quote Box|"I think I'll stick to drowning dwarves and cooking puppies."}} | ||
+ | {{Quote Box|"I mean, how dangerous can an elephant be, anyway?"}} | ||
+ | {{Quote Box|Toady has created a masterpiece!}} | ||
+ | {{Quote Box|Is that a hammer in your ≡Giant cave spider silk trousers≡ or are you just happy to see me?}} | ||
+ | {{Quote Box|Do these +narrow chimpanzee leather trousers+ make me look fat?}} | ||
+ | {{Quote Box|This wiki menaces with spikes of bread.}} | ||
+ | {{Quote Box|I can't put my finger on it. Something about this [[Fire|‼]]Cat tallow roast[[Fire|‼]] tastes funny.}} | ||
+ | {{Quote Box|"This is why artificial intelligences won't be taking over the world within the next ten years or so: NORMAL people don't have to be TOLD not to milk a cow that's on fire!"<br> - [[Sowelu ]]}} | ||
+ | {{Quote Box|Fun fact: Ditching the starting anvil for a shit ton of logs makes for a strong early defense by way of a palisade...}} | ||
+ | {{Quote Box|"The interface is coming - it's not coming in your lifetime but it's coming."<br> - [[Toady One]]}} | ||
+ | {{Quote Box|"Preeetty much finished the first pass on religions. This release still requires buildings, migrants and hist fig finalization. None of that should be difficult, though I suspect finalization will throw a bug or two my way. I suppose that will cause me to blow apart.<br>-[[Toady One]]}} | ||
+ | {{Quote Box|How to Control your Pets: It's no coincidence that 'kittens' rhymes with 'mittens'...}} | ||
− | " | + | | style="vertical-align: top; padding: 0" | |
+ | {{Quote Box|Toady withdraws from society. Toady has begun a [[Strange_mood|mysterious]] construction!}} | ||
+ | {{Quote Box|Beware of the Elephant's greatest evolutionary trait: [[Talk:Elephant#Stealth_Elephants|Stealth]].}} | ||
+ | {{Quote Box|Let us never forget the last words of Inod the Stoker, [[Fortress_Paintrag#1056|"Aaah! Gorillas!"]]}} | ||
+ | {{Quote Box|[[Children|Newborn]] Zuglar Baldnessgranite prefers to consume Gorilla. A sure sign of his unparalleled strength!}} | ||
+ | {{Quote Box|[http://www.somethingawful.com/d/video-game-article/duke-nukem-image.php In an unrelated article] - I had no idea elephants could bounce that high!}} | ||
+ | {{Quote Box|[[Toady]] looses a roaring laughter, [[Fey|fell]] and terrible! Toady has butchered a spammer!}} | ||
+ | {{Quote Box|[[Elephant]]s are like huge, wrinkly [[ambusher|ninjas]].}} | ||
+ | {{Quote Box|Tobul Dumatfath, Fisherdwarf cancels Fish: Interrupted by [[carp]].}} | ||
+ | {{Quote Box|The critical question is this''':''' do dead elf bones yield more crossbow bolts than the average number of bolts necessary to kill an elf?}} | ||
+ | {{Quote Box|Dev Notes''':''' Stopped booze food from melting, even though it probably should}} | ||
+ | {{Quote Box|"It was a funny bug -- it would just pick the first living unit in the civilization's list, regardless of what their qualifications were, drag them out of their town, and have them show up at your fortress, without actually letting them be the king." -[[Toady One]]}} | ||
+ | {{Quote Box|Wolf cancels Breathe: Interrupted by <br>≡Ash Bolt≡.}} | ||
+ | {{Quote Box| Who knew bridges could be such incredible killing machines?}} | ||
+ | {{Quote Box|Breeding is difficult when your genitalia fell off years ago.}} | ||
+ | {{Quote Box|Snodub was the only person in the history of the world to have "Chunky" in her name.<br>-[[Toady One]]}} | ||
− | " | + | | style="vertical-align: top; padding: 0" | |
+ | {{Quote Box|What is that [[magma|red stuff]] coming towards me? Oh well, I think I'll stay in this [[channel|trench-shaped]] thing.}} | ||
+ | {{Quote Box|“Dwarf Fortress" ... "Like chess, only with short people that can catch on [[fire]] like [[clothing|rags]] soaked in tar, and lots of [[booze]]." ... "Like chess.”}} | ||
+ | {{Quote Box|Dwarf Fortress has taught me that all the world's problems would be substantially reduced had our parent civilizations never minted more than four stacks of [[coins]].}} | ||
+ | {{Quote Box|"Tosid Idenarzes likes tentacle demons for their corrupt intentions." There! Now we've covered all of the seven deadly sins.}} | ||
+ | {{Quote Box|Toady One likes donors for their [http://www.bay12games.com/support.html generosity]. He absolutely detests trolls.}} | ||
+ | {{Quote Box|Booze does all the work in forts. Dwarves are just booze exoskeletons.}} | ||
+ | {{Quote Box|My unconscious and bleeding [[mayor]] just mandated the construction of some goods.}} | ||
+ | {{Quote Box|Remember, they are DWARVES. Dwarves are born fat. They often look like hairy spheres on their first day or so.}} | ||
+ | {{Quote Box|"Didn't you read the manual? He he he he... the manual... ..."<br>-[[Toady One]]}} | ||
+ | {{Quote Box|"Dwarves are strange creatures who balance out at "happy" because on one hand their wife was eaten by elephants and on the other they just ate in a REALLY NICE dining room."<br>-[[shadow_archmagi]]}} | ||
+ | {{Quote Box|Here we have a link to amusing quotes and important advice in the [[Main Page/Quote Archive|Quote Archive]], all of which are more important and/or funny than this one.}} | ||
+ | {{Quote Box|[FIREIMMUNE] makes them think that [[magma]] is safe, but it doesn't actually make them fireproof. This can lead to some rather interesting results.}} | ||
− | + | | style="vertical-align: top; padding: 0" | | |
− | + | {{Quote Box|I can just imagine a wagon throwing a tantrum and tossing all its contents at people.}} | |
− | + | {{Quote Box|"Madness? THIS IS DWARF FORTRESS!" -Dwarven King}} | |
− | + | {{Quote Box|'I wonder what would happen if I poked that elephant with a stick' - Gib Trampledmangled.}} | |
− | + | {{Quote Box|If in doubt, [[fluid|flood]] the fort!}} | |
− | + | {{Quote Box|Döbesh Udosdeb has been ecstatic lately. He was forced to eat a friend to survive. He enjoyed a truly decadent meal.}} | |
− | + | {{Quote Box|Zasit Anamalîth, Carpenter is throwing a tantrum! | |
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | " | ||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | I can just imagine a wagon throwing a tantrum and tossing all its contents at people. | ||
− | |||
− | "Madness? THIS IS DWARF FORTRESS!" -Dwarven King | ||
− | |||
− | 'I wonder what would happen if I poked that elephant with a stick' - Gib Trampledmangled. | ||
− | |||
− | If in doubt, [[ | ||
− | |||
− | Döbesh Udosdeb has been ecstatic lately. He was forced to eat a friend to survive. He enjoyed a truly decadent meal. | ||
− | |||
− | Zasit Anamalîth, Carpenter is throwing a tantrum! | ||
Felsite Bridge destroyed by Zasit Anamalîth, Carpenter. | Felsite Bridge destroyed by Zasit Anamalîth, Carpenter. | ||
− | Zasit Anamalîth, Carpenter has drowned. | + | Zasit Anamalîth, Carpenter has drowned.}} |
+ | {{Quote Box|"Iron [[screw pump]] exercise equipment. Pump iron and get superdwarvenly strong!"}} | ||
+ | {{Quote Box|Only you can prevent fortress fires.}} | ||
+ | {{Quote Box|On the assumption that there is something scarier than a hydra out there. | ||
− | + | ''Your in-laws have arrived from Shinthumtobul Imketh.''}} | |
− | + | {{Quote Box|'Leader' Igëratìr, Clerk has created Razuk Lanzil, an Obsidian Crown!"<br><br>-"I think the leader business is getting to his head!}} | |
− | + | {{Quote Box|If cow cheese is made from cow's milk, what is dwarven cheese made of?}} | |
− | + | {{Quote Box|"Damn, isn't there a way to start out where fights aren't like a coin toss?"<br><br>"Ironically enough, tossing coins is among one of the most effective forms of combat."}} | |
− | + | {{Quote Box|The violence, aggression, pain, madness, sadness of the ASCII characters never ceases to amaze me...}} | |
− | ''Your in-laws have arrived from Shinthumtobul Imketh.'' | + | {{Quote Box|M.C. Hammerer.<br>"You, peasant! Thou hast stolen a possession of a nobledwarf, and must be punished!"<br>"What? B-but I didn't-"<br>"Silence, knave! I shall teach you not to steal!"<br>*SMACK*<br>"CAN'T TOUCH THIS!"<br>*SMACK*<br>"CAN'T TOUCH THAT!"<br>*SMACK*<br>Etc...}} |
− | + | {{Quote Box|"What happened in 1048?" <br />"<i>Jreengus</i> occurred."}} | |
− | 'Leader' Igëratìr, Clerk has created Razuk Lanzil, an Obsidian Crown!" - "I think the leader business is getting to his head! | + | {{Quote Box|"Well, that goblin master lasher was nice to my dwarf, in a way - he handed the guy a ballgag before the lashings began..."}} |
− | + | {{Quote Box|"So they'd be shooting things, and suddenly they'd go STOP! HAMMERTIME!"}} | |
− | If cow cheese is made from cow's milk, what is dwarven cheese made of? | + | {{Quote Box|"Does not the book of Armok state that "thou shalt not covet thy neighbours burning trousers, for he who does shall surely perish in flames?"}} |
− | |||
− | "Damn, isn't there a way to start out where fights aren't like a coin toss?" | ||
− | "Ironically enough, tossing coins is among one of the most effective forms of combat." | ||
− | |||
− | The violence, aggression, pain, madness, | ||
− | |||
− | M.C. Hammerer. | ||
− | "You, peasant! Thou hast stolen a possession of a nobledwarf, and must be punished!" | ||
− | "What? B-but I didn't-" | ||
− | "Silence, knave! I shall teach you not to steal!" | ||
− | *SMACK* | ||
− | "CAN'T TOUCH THIS!" | ||
− | *SMACK* | ||
− | "CAN'T TOUCH THAT!" | ||
− | *SMACK* | ||
− | Etc... | ||
− | |||
− | "What happened in 1048?" | ||
− | "<i>Jreengus</i> occurred." | ||
− | |||
− | "Well, that goblin master lasher was nice to my dwarf, in a way - he handed the guy a ballgag before the lashings began..." | ||
− | |||
− | "So they'd be shooting things, and suddenly they'd go STOP! HAMMERTIME!" | ||
− | |||
− | "Does not the book of Armok state that "thou shalt not covet thy neighbours burning trousers, for he who does shall surely perish in flames?" | ||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
− | |||
+ | <div style="float: left; margin-right: 1em"> | ||
[[Category:Humor and stories]] | [[Category:Humor and stories]] | ||
− | |||
− | |||
− |