Dwarf Fortress Wiki - User contributions [en]

Main Page/Quote

2010-06-20T16:31:31Z

Booz:

<noinclude>
='''READ THE MANUAL''' or your changes will not show up.=
</noinclude>{{Choose|c={{rand|109}}
|I can't put my finger on it. Something about this [[Fire|‼]]Cat tallow roast[[Fire|‼]] tastes funny.
|Toady withdraws from society. Toady has begun a [[Strange_mood|mysterious]] construction!
|Let us never forget the last words of Inod the Stoker, [http://archive.dwarffortresswiki.net/index.php/Fortress_Paintrag#1056 "Aaah! Gorillas!"]
|[[Children|Newborn]] Zuglar Baldnessgranite prefers to consume Gorilla. A sure sign of his unparalleled strength!
|[http://www.somethingawful.com/d/video-game-article/duke-nukem-image.php In an unrelated article] - I had no idea elephants could bounce that high!
|[[Toady]] looses a roaring laughter, [[Fey|fell]] and terrible! Toady has butchered a spammer!
|The critical question is this''':''' do elf bones yield more crossbow bolts than the average number of bolts necessary to kill an elf?
|"Dwarf Fortress" ... "Like chess, only with short people that can catch on [[fire]] like [[clothing|rags]] soaked in tar, and lots of [[booze]]." ... "Like chess."
|Dwarf Fortress has taught me that all the world's problems would be substantially reduced had our parent civilizations never minted more than four stacks of [[coins]].
|[[Booze]] does all the work in forts. Dwarves are just booze exoskeletons.
|My unconscious and bleeding [[mayor]] just mandated the construction of some goods.
|I can just imagine a wagon throwing a tantrum and tossing all its contents at people.
|Döbesh Udosdeb has been ecstatic lately. He was forced to eat a friend to survive. He enjoyed a truly decadent meal.
|Iron [[screw pump]] exercise equipment. Pump iron and get superdwarvenly strong!
|The violence, aggression, pain, madness, sadness of the ASCII characters never ceases to amaze me...
|Wait, you're MAKING animals? —''Torak'' At this moment, yes, I am smelting cows. —''Spiders Everywhere''
|"Didn't you read the manual? He he he he... the manual... ..." --[[Toady One]]
|(Compared to real-world years) Dwarven years are shorter. --Sowelu Very fitting to dwarves, I must add. --Sean Mirrsen
|[[Magma]] is not a [[water]] source. Dwarves can't drink it or supply it to their wounded. --[[User:AlienChickenPie|AlienChickenPie]]
|"<nowiki>[B]</nowiki>oats are the enemy of tiles. And tiles are the enemy of boats." --[[Toady One]]
|"I went through and fixed a few places where forbidden/on fire weren't being respected for next time. Burning milkable creatures were still a problem for example." --[[Toady One]]
|"You have been processed! Go forth, now, and edit!" --[[User:Savok|Savok]]
|"What happened in 1048?" "Jreengus occurred."
|Making rock instruments isn't nearly as awesome as it sounds --Shandrunn
|The cyclops I was quested to kill had a thousand year history of badassery, and all of that without the leg it lost in the Year 3 (a dwarf bit it off... I should probably deal with that). --[[Toady One]]
|[FIREIMMUNE] makes them think that [[magma]] is safe but doesn't actually make them fireproof. This can lead to some rather interesting results.
|Endok Cerolneth has begun a mysterious construction!
Endok Cerolneth, Planter has given birth to a girl.
|"Incendia sunt socia vestra, armaque vestra, fortesque Montis Domi." "Magma is your ally, your weapon, the strength of the Mountain-Home." --Eita
|"Stopped people from giving quests to kill themselves." --[[Toady One]]
|"...And I simply doubt we have a need for 7 fishery workers. On top of that, a second soap maker. The hell IS soap?!" --Zero
|"This is a terrible pun. All craftsdwarfship is of the poorest quality." - [http://tinyurl.com/6yruly Soup_alex]
|"The default mental state of a dwarf is madness. Sanity is a temporary condition - a PRIVILEGE you have to EARN!" --[[User:Fedor|Fedor]]
|"Why get normal cats? I buy lolcats in the embark screen. Much more fun to engrave about them." --Yanlin
|"Dwarf Fortress taught me it was okay to make a suit out of my neighbour's skin, as long as I gave it a name."
|"Got rid of world gen crash during succession after death of prolific long-standing position holders with inbred descendants" --[[Toady One]]
|"There was a typo in the siegers' campfire code. When the fires went out, so did the game." --[[Toady One]]
|"Hey, what does that flashing red and orange text mean? What? Why is there smoke everywhere? Oh god, are those BABIES on fire?" --[[User:StrawberryBunny|StrawberryBunny]]
|"It's never 'just a game' when you're losing." --George Carlin (if he played Dwarf Fortress)
|Not that building a bridge out of soap makes much sense to begin with anyway.
|Note that while you cannot milk larger animals yourself, civilizations can still milk animals "off screen" for your benefit.
|Tosid Idenarzes likes tentacle demons for their corrupt intentions. "There! Now we've covered all of the seven deadly sins."
|"Litast Idenudesh, baby, is throwing a tantrum! Inod Litastrilem, Mayor, has lost consciousness. Inod Litastrilem, Mayor, has bled to death."
|"Known bug #780: Town guard becomes a criminal after getting an adventurer's stolen weapon stuck in his body."
|"Udib Toblumaid, Axedwarf, cancels sparring in Barracks: too insane." [[User:Ben jamm1n|Ben jamm1n]]
|Kosoth Cilobonol, Bone Carver cancels Drink: Unconscious.
|Sizir the Snail of Bait is a deity of The Fresh Towers. Sizir most often takes the form of a female dwarf and is associated with jealousy.
|Sibrek Tanbim likes Limestone, Tin, Smoky Quartz, the color crimson, bolts, scepters, anvils, and rock blocks for their lack of quality levels.
|Most vermin teleport, so nothing actually contains them. -[[User:Fuzzy|Fuzzy]]
|There are 5 articles in category Lore: Armok, Cave Adaptation, Elephant, Philosopher, and Vomit.
|There is nothing to catch in the magma pipe.
|Bug #563: mayor ordered himself beaten for failing to make crystal glass objects
|If cow cheese is made from cow's milk, what is dwarven cheese made of?
|Bugs are opportunities to cause unprecedented amounts of destruction. --Zorgn
|"You know, Urist, you've got a mind like an +Ash Trap+."--[[User:Destor|Destor]]
|'''Zander J:''' "Is there a way to stop immigration without setting the population cap?" '''Yanlin:''' "Magma."
|An animal trainer just suddenly stopped working and hid himself in a workshop. He's probably going to make a wardog out of rock and goblin skulls.
|Bug #597: Flying creatures give birth in midair, leading to tragedy.
|'''Urdim Kutamèrith, Pump Operator, has created Rakusttenshed, a Glumprong blowgun!''' Urdim, you are a freaking idiot.
|<Forkez> I don't get the game, but I do get that tunnels flooded with water is a bad thing.
|"If you give a dwarf a fire, he will be warm for a night. If you set a dwarf on fire, he will be warm for the rest of his life."
|"Since the Elves said they won't let me cut down any trees, I bought 50 of their logs instead."
|Do not make a trading race that breathes fire. I REPEAT, DON'T!! EVER!!
|Dwarf Fortress: Because burning elves are funny.
|The carp has drowned.
|There's one thing a dwarf needs, and that's stones. And alcohol... and magma... but mainly stones.
|"I swear to god once I saw a dwarf who was labeled as being Strong, Very Agile, Very Tough... and ''Clean''. But it was probably just a bad dream."
|Urist McRandy has been ecstatic lately. He brought somebody to bed lately.
|"Dwarven children kidnapped and incorporated into goblin society might sh... shave." --Toady One
|Bug #871: babies fall to death when born on stairs
|Bug #1031: a merchant pack animal caught at an old dwarf site during adv mode was wearing a full set of clothes
|"[[Magma]] solves everything. [[Fire]] just ruins the [[booze]]." -sonerohi
|You can't yet strangle people with the exposed guts, though I suppose that's now within reach. --[[Toady One]]
|Look, there are roving clumps of sentient lava outside, ... This isn't going to get better. --PTTG??
|...and the only surviving dwarf is a noble who has mandated the construction of crowns and clear glass items to the empty halls. --PTTG??
|Adil Idenlocun is conflicted: "When possible he prefers to consume purring maggot, Dwarven ale and Dwarven syrup. He absolutely detests purring maggots."
|"I had to leave just before I tested the dwarf with the boiling gold blood." -- Toady the Great One
|Urdim Zatinod has been quite content lately. She has lost an annoying friend to tragedy lately.
|I added two levers. One opens the magma. The other sets free all the cats. --Someone in Headshoots
|"As Manbaspecut, Human Merchant is stricken by melancholy!" "Muskox has gone stark raving mad!" I think something is wrong with the human caravan...
|"Somebody needs to build an active volcano inside a fortress inside an active volcano." --Boksi
|It has stats. It can be killed.
|Bug #432: Bones pop out of coffins.
|Thanks. I wish I had known that about three forts ago.
|If I remembered what the fucking lever did, I'd pull it! <...pulls lever anyway...>
|Sarvesh Ralrubal likes olivine, olivine and olivine.
|"So let me get this straight. We managed to destroy a dwarven civilization while only managing a single town??"
|Kara Mase, the Glory of Amusing: Engraved on the wall is an image of a dwarf and an elf. The dwarf is committing a depraved act on the elf.
|Once saw a water skin with red beryl spikes. I still wonder how you would drink from that.
|Watching a kobold thief be chased by batman is very satisfying.
|Kol Tölunimush has been ecstatic lately. He killed somebody by accident while sparring recently. He took joy in slaughter lately. He has lost a lover to tragedy lately. He has witnessed death. He had a satisfying sparring session recently.
|You haven't embarked on a quest - you've joined a religion. --Quietust
|The alert statuses (i.e., "Stay Indoors") have been entirely redone. You may set several custom alerts with user defined [[scheduling]].
|There was kind of a violent explosion of boiling human blood when I was testing a human vs a magma man in the arena... it was a little weird, but I guess that's okay. --[[Toady One]]
|Mew? Chop!
|"If Dwarf Fortress geology is to be believed, then the Earth's core is made of microline and demons."
|'They're firing arrows at us! Quickly! Raise the babies!!' -Urdim McSquadLeader, mother of 8
|It started raining, then all my dwarves outside started bleeding to death. On inspection their upper bodies were missing.
|It seems that a fresh recruit given a crossbow and a quiver with ammo in it will opt to run up to the enemy and bash them with the crossbow.
|Bug introduced in the latest version: Firemen can have their flames severed. These flames then just lie around the place.
|You stab Iron Man in the right leg from behind with your adamantine short sword, breaking away a piece of the gas and shattering the iron! The Beak Dog is caught in a burst of Iron Man gas! Beak Dog vomits into the Iron Man gas.
|Urist McDairy, Milker cancels store item in stockpile: handling dangerous creature
|Ildomushat, Fish Cleaner, cancels Clean Self: Could not find path.
|Losing is [[Fun]]!!! --The Motto of Dwarf Fortress
|I hate walking under dwarven archways. You never know how many mechanized crossbows they have hidden underneath those damn things.
|"bibo ergo sum, I drink, therefore I am." -- Dwarven Philosopher
|This is a menacing iron spike. This object menaces with spikes of iron.
|Kogsak is a deity of The Helpful Diamond. Kogsak most often takes the form of a dwarf and is associated with fortresses.
|The Forgotten Beast pushes The Wrestler in the head, bruising the muscle, driving the skull through the brain, and tearing apart the brain! The Wrestler has been struck down!
| Goblin Chops at the Diagnostician in the right leg, damaging the muscle! Urist McHouse is Unconscious!
| Limul Itebdesis, trader has been Possessed. Limul Itebdesis, trader has created Stodir Isethlolor, a Mortgage-Backed Security!
}}<noinclude>[[Category:Humor and stories]]</noinclude>

v0.31:Appraiser

2010-04-02T22:41:50Z

Booz: Created page with 'The appraiser skill relates to trading and item value estimation. In order to have access to the Fortress value estimates in the status (z) menu, as well as inidividual item val…'

The appraiser skill relates to trading and item value estimation.

In order to have access to the Fortress value estimates in the status (z) menu, as well as inidividual item values, a dwarf with the Appraiser skill must be appointed as broker in the noble screen. (note that this is not necessary for the display of item quality - the indicators near the item names - which will always appear.)

40d:Dwarven physics

2010-03-13T19:59:28Z

Booz:

{{D for dwarf}}

'''Dwarven physics''' is the study of how matter interacts with other matter within the world of Dwarf Fortress. Scholars of traditional Newtonian physics should note that Dwarven physics may or may not correspond with traditional Physics.

It is also worthy of mention that Dwarven physics is a highly complex subject, and thus only be approached by extremely intelligent, extremely curious, or extremely insane individuals.

==Overview==
Those familiar with traditional physics will recognize the following equation:

'''''E = mc2'''''

This equation, read from left to right, says: "Energy is equal to mass times the speed of light squared."

The following equation is known as the ''Dwarven Equation of Life, the Universe, and Everything'', and is the Dwarven adaption of the above:

'''''E''''' {{Dwarf|#fff|10px}} '''''mc2'''''

From left to right, it says: "Energy may or may not equal mass times the speed of light squared." Needless to say, there is a small amount of ambiguity when dealing with Dwarven physics. 

== The Dwarven method ==
The Dwarven method is a rubric by which experiments in Dwarf Fortress are conducted, but should not be confused with the Scientific method. Although the rigidity of the Dwarven method is disputed, the majority of important Dwarven experiments follow the Method. The Dwarven method consists of the following general guidelines: 

=== Sample size ===
Again, those familiar with traditional science may recognize the phrase, where it normally means, "The more the better." However, in Dwarven experiments, it means, "The '''''bigger''''' the better. For instance, a 500-meter magma fall is preferable to a 50-meter one. Now, if you had ''two'' 500-meter magma falls...

=== Repeatability ===
This is whether or not the experiment can be repeated, and if so, under what conditions. If there are few or no restrictions on repeatability, and your experiment receives the same results every time, it will likely be accepted as Dwarven fact. On the other hand, if said experiment can only be reproduced at infrequent or unpredictable intervals, and you were the only one to witness it, and you forgot to take a screenshot, and the experiment can only take place on your computer, and you mysteriously misplaced the savegame, your experiment will likely be dismissed as pointless drivel.

=== Dwarven factor ===
This factor is the approximate relative value of the prodigiousness of an experiment. Values must be real numbers, more specifically subsets of the Integer family. In layman's terms, the Dwarven factor is how awesome an experiment is. Keep in mind that the D-factor is relative, and thus intended to be compared with other values.

For instance, a cannon that shoots water may have a D-factor value of 100. However, if this cannon was constructed completely out of Adamantine, or if it was modified to shoot Magma instead, the D-factor may increase to several thousand, depending on the amount of magma used.

Note that a graph of the Dwarven factor may, and often will, asymptote. Vertical asymptotes are often seen when the D-factor of one experiment is just greater than that of another experiment.

Let us say that a hypothetical Player A constructed a catapult that hurls legendary Hammerdwarves at invaders, but Player B constructed a nearly identical catapult, except that it throws Zombie carp at invaders. Let us also say that the Zombie carp catapult has an assigned D-factor of 1,500. Both catapults ultimately accomplish the same task, (in this case, the complete annihilation of the invaders) but due to the inherent superiority of Zombie carp to hammerdwarves, (and everything else except Ironblood himself, booze, and magma) the Zombie carp catapult must have a higher D-factor than the other one. In this case, the D-factor graph of Catapult A will likely have an asymptote at 1,500. For those of you who aren't so calculus-savvy, this means that the D-factor of the "A" catapult will be approxamitely equal to 1,499.999999999, but will never reach 1,500.

Lastly, there is a direct correlation between the Dwarven factor and Sample size. Simply put, the bigger, the more Dwarvenly, ironic because the dwarves themselves are...small.

== The Dwarven status quo ==
The Dwarven index is strikingly similar to the concept of entropy. Although it involves chaos, the Index is more related with the innate stupidity of dwarves. A rough example of entropy is if a dwarf is given two decisions, and it is completely uncertain which one he will choose. (The concept of entropy relates loosely to the ''Dwarven Equation of Everything''.)

Even though it is similar to the concept of Entropy, the Dwarven index may produce different results, hence the differentiation between the two. The Dwarven index states, in a nutshell, that when a dwarf is faced with a decision he or she will make the ''wrong'' decision approximately 99.7% of the time. This could range from something minor like taking the long route to the kitchen, or to something like building a wall from the wrong side, getting stuck alone with a siege, ''dying a gory death'', and [[fun|sending the entirety of your fort into a massive tantrum spiral as the invaders split their sides laughing]]. While entropy will produce the wrong decision roughly 50% of the time, the Dwarven index will produce the wrong decision 99.7% of the time.

=== Summary of the Dwarven status quo ===
Dwarves are stupid.

== Discrepancies between Dwarven and traditional physics ==
The following items are possible in Dwarf Fortress, but impossible otherwise.

=== Dwarven perpetual motion device ===
As the name implies, this is a device that continuously generates power. Specifically, it generates power by building a [[water wheel]] in a [[waterfall]], then using said waterfall to power a [[screw pump]]. The screw pump is used to pump [[water]] back to its original [[Z-axis|Z-level]] and recycle it through the waterfall. Somehow, the device consistently generates a surplus of rotational energy.

=== Quantum garbage dumps ===
Perhaps the most common Dwarven anomaly, this is simply a 1x1 garbage [[dump]] zone, with massive amounts of items (usually [[stone]]) all contained in a single tile. The practicality is obvious—where else are you going to put all that stone?

=== Matter annihilation ===
Another common method of garbage disposal. Items and [[creature]]s in DF can be "annihilated" by placing them under a [[drawbridge]], and lowering the bridge. This is an example where the ''Dwarven Equation of Everything'' states that energy is ''not'' equal to mass times the speed of light squared. If the opposite was true, players would witness a massive explosion and a corresponding drop in FPS rate whenever an item was annihilated.

====Indestructible Ultra-fearsome-Vehicle====

One special case of the Matter annihilation: annihilating the Matter of a [[wagon]] is simply not possible, which not only could be seen as further argument, that Dwarven physics have no relations between Matter and energy, but also it means that there must be kind of "God-Matter". But the latter is concern of the [[philosopher]] and his Dwarven philosophy.

Others point out that this is simply because wagons are too large to crush - observant individuals have noted that other large creatures such as [[dragon]]s, [[giant]]s, and even [[elephant]]s and [[hippo]]s are similarly immune to the matter-annihilating power of the drawbridge.

=== Matter creation ===
The reverse of matter annihilation is creating something from nothing. Examples include:

:* Obtaining enough [[sand]] from one tile to build a giant fortress out of [[glass]]
:* Obtaining an infinite amount of [[water]] from a single [[aquifer]] wall, isolated from the rest of the aquifer
:* Forging metal [[bars]] into [[blocks]], increasing their mass by 25% in the process
:* [[Melt]]ing 25 individual metal bolts (which consumed 1 bar to make), and retrieving 2.5 metal bars from those.

=== General Relativity ===
It is also important to note that while relativity is indeed a proven phenomenon in Dwarven Physics, the catalyst for time dilation is not the speed an object moves at (as in traditional physics) but instead the population of its region. For decades, Dwarven Scientists have observed that, as local populations increase (dwarf, animal, or [[Waterfall|otherwise]]), the relative passage of time slows. To combat this, mayors have been known to enact ordinances ranging from the [[Maximizing framerate|simple and logical]] to the [[Catsplosion#Thermonuclear_catsplosion|ethically dubious]].

In a recent study by the Center for Dwarven Advancement, it was found that 40% of pioneer dwarves left the Mountainhome due to "framerate issues," with a margin of error of ±Booze.

=== Box of Everlasting Fire ===
Throughout man's history, fire has been used a super-weapon (Greek fire, flamethrowers, napalm). For the dwarves, this has manifested itself most notably with magma, and though fire typically consumes oxygen, [[Bin#Thermonuclear_Reaction|if contained within a magma-safe bin]], combustible materials immersed in magma become an infinitely-fueled source of [[fun]].

=== Super-Deadly Projectiles ===
Adventuring Dwarves have frequently noted that many objects can make quite effective projectile weapons. There have, in fact, been several documented cases of Dwarves pitching handfuls of vomit at elves, with deadly results. This is thought to be another manifestation of the ''Dwarven Equation of Life, the Universe, and Everything.'' In this case the (kinetic) energy of the thrown vomit increases without bound, often [[wound|causing the target's torso to explode in gore]]. However, it is also a distinct possibility that the act of throwing the vomit causes a hiccup in the space-time continuum, and actually causes the constant of light-speed to decrease everywhere except for the thrown vomit, essentially causing the covalent carbon bonds in the impact area to time warp and royally screwing over the unfortunate Elf. This curious anomaly has lead to adventurers winging any random crap that they can find in the general direction of their enemies. Some dwarves complain that this is "unethical fighting," but braining an [[Elf]] with a Live beetle is, in most cases, just too tempting to resist.

=== Indestructibile Constructions ===
All modern Dwarvish construction is based upon the principles of making materials indestructible. Dwarvish masons and carpenters are trained to make walls and floors with stone and wood, but are also capable of putting the material into a quantum state where they cannot be moved or destroyed by conventional means. Such technology has allowed incredible feats such as magma reservoirs made of wood, or 1x1 stone pillars that can hold up an entire metropolis without additional support. This phenomenon has also been observed in the other races (but to a much lesser extent.) Humans have a very primitive understanding of it, making little wood huts, but these are dwarfed in comparison to the various megaconstructs built by the dwarves. The Elves have an irrational moral code which prohibits them from altering the quantum state of wood (they say it's inhumane.) Even goblins have utilized this construction method. Ever since the beginning of Dwarven construction, sieging parties have tried to find ways of countering dwarven constructions, with little success. However, through trial and error, it has been found that if the construct does not have a direct physical link to the Earth in its current state, it becomes very unstable and reacts violently with the force of gravity, then it hurdles itself towards the ground with enough force to obliterate anything underneath it.

=== Urist McPauli's Conditionnal Inclusion Principle ===

The pauli exclusion principle of Normal Quantum Physics (roughly) states that two elementary particle cannot occupy the same quantum state simultaneously. This prevents you from placing two object at the exact same place and holds your beer inside the barrel. The McPauli Conditionnal Inclusion Principle of Dwarven Quantum Physics however states that two particles May occupy the exact same spot without any interaction, depending on the final object they compose. For instance, it is possible to stack an unlimited amount of Wooden Short Swords in a one-cubic-meter space, but it is impossible to place two assembled wooden beds in that same space, even though they are composed of a small fraction of the same wood. This is an interesting example of Dwarven recursive logic where consequences lead to causes.

On a more theoretical (and less practical) side, it has been theorized that the workshops, where the wood is transformed into either short swords or bed, are actually quantum transformers where the basic properties of matter are altered : beds are made of standard, Pauli-compliant particles, while short swords are composed of non-fermionic thingies, although theire true composition remain uncertain.

== Dwarven Physics Mimetism ==
Physics Mimetism refers to the ability of dwarves to mimic real-world physical phenomenas. The most well-known example of physics mimetism is the [[tantrum]] spiraling, which is almost identical in principle to a nuclear chain reaction, with only a slight difference : although the reaction is extremely exothermic, you cannot use this energy to power screw pumps. Yet.

Besides this difference, nuclear chain reactions and tantrum chain reactions behave in a similar way : Dwarves take the role of nuclear fuel nucleis, unhappy thought are similar to neutrons (with properties actually close to neutrinos, even lead doors wont stop them) and various devices like awesome rooms, lavish meals and Booze serving as neutron moderators. When a dwarf nuclei undergo nuclear fission, it sends high-energy unhappy thought through the reaction chamber (the fortress). These unhappy thoughts interact with other dwarf nucleis and may cause more nuclear fissions, leading to a chain reaction where more and more Dwarves are tantruming. Fortunately, it is possible to moderate the effects of unhappy-thought-carrying-neutrinos by giving good, happy thoughts. The Most common moderator is booze, but other exists, although less efficient. Taking joy in slaughter was once a popular unhappy-thought moderator but is very dangerous to use as it can ''accelerate'' neutrons instead of slowing them when overheated. This was a prime cause of the catastrophic reaction of Dwarfnobyl which scattered deadly Elf settlements over a wide area (cleanup operations in progress).

[[Category:Physics]]
[[Category:Constructions]]

40d:Dwarven physics

2010-03-13T18:34:02Z

Booz:

{{D for dwarf}}

'''Dwarven physics''' is the study of how matter interacts with other matter within the world of Dwarf Fortress. Scholars of traditional Newtonian physics should note that Dwarven physics may or may not correspond with traditional Physics.

It is also worthy of mention that Dwarven physics is a highly complex subject, and thus only be approached by extremely intelligent, extremely curious, or extremely insane individuals.

==Overview==
Those familiar with traditional physics will recognize the following equation:

'''''E = mc2'''''

This equation, read from left to right, says: "Energy is equal to mass times the speed of light squared."

The following equation is known as the ''Dwarven Equation of Life, the Universe, and Everything'', and is the Dwarven adaption of the above:

'''''E''''' {{Dwarf|#fff|10px}} '''''mc2'''''

From left to right, it says: "Energy may or may not equal mass times the speed of light squared." Needless to say, there is a small amount of ambiguity when dealing with Dwarven physics. 

== The Dwarven method ==
The Dwarven method is a rubric by which experiments in Dwarf Fortress are conducted, but should not be confused with the Scientific method. Although the rigidity of the Dwarven method is disputed, the majority of important Dwarven experiments follow the Method. The Dwarven method consists of the following general guidelines: 

=== Sample size ===
Again, those familiar with traditional science may recognize the phrase, where it normally means, "The more the better." However, in Dwarven experiments, it means, "The '''''bigger''''' the better. For instance, a 500-meter magma fall is preferable to a 50-meter one. Now, if you had ''two'' 500-meter magma falls...

=== Repeatability ===
This is whether or not the experiment can be repeated, and if so, under what conditions. If there are few or no restrictions on repeatability, and your experiment receives the same results every time, it will likely be accepted as Dwarven fact. On the other hand, if said experiment can only be reproduced at infrequent or unpredictable intervals, and you were the only one to witness it, and you forgot to take a screenshot, and the experiment can only take place on your computer, and you mysteriously misplaced the savegame, your experiment will likely be dismissed as pointless drivel.

=== Dwarven factor ===
This factor is the approximate relative value of the prodigiousness of an experiment. Values must be real numbers, more specifically subsets of the Integer family. In layman's terms, the Dwarven factor is how awesome an experiment is. Keep in mind that the D-factor is relative, and thus intended to be compared with other values.

For instance, a cannon that shoots water may have a D-factor value of 100. However, if this cannon was constructed completely out of Adamantine, or if it was modified to shoot Magma instead, the D-factor may increase to several thousand, depending on the amount of magma used.

Note that a graph of the Dwarven factor may, and often will, asymptote. Vertical asymptotes are often seen when the D-factor of one experiment is just greater than that of another experiment.

Let us say that a hypothetical Player A constructed a catapult that hurls legendary Hammerdwarves at invaders, but Player B constructed a nearly identical catapult, except that it throws Zombie carp at invaders. Let us also say that the Zombie carp catapult has an assigned D-factor of 1,500. Both catapults ultimately accomplish the same task, (in this case, the complete annihilation of the invaders) but due to the inherent superiority of Zombie carp to hammerdwarves, (and everything else except Ironblood himself, booze, and magma) the Zombie carp catapult must have a higher D-factor than the other one. In this case, the D-factor graph of Catapult A will likely have an asymptote at 1,500. For those of you who aren't so calculus-savvy, this means that the D-factor of the "A" catapult will be approxamitely equal to 1,499.999999999, but will never reach 1,500.

Lastly, there is a direct correlation between the Dwarven factor and Sample size. Simply put, the bigger, the more Dwarvenly, ironic because the dwarves themselves are...small.

== The Dwarven status quo ==
The Dwarven index is strikingly similar to the concept of entropy. Although it involves chaos, the Index is more related with the innate stupidity of dwarves. A rough example of entropy is if a dwarf is given two decisions, and it is completely uncertain which one he will choose. (The concept of entropy relates loosely to the ''Dwarven Equation of Everything''.)

Even though it is similar to the concept of Entropy, the Dwarven index may produce different results, hence the differentiation between the two. The Dwarven index states, in a nutshell, that when a dwarf is faced with a decision he or she will make the ''wrong'' decision approximately 99.7% of the time. This could range from something minor like taking the long route to the kitchen, or to something like building a wall from the wrong side, getting stuck alone with a siege, ''dying a gory death'', and [[fun|sending the entirety of your fort into a massive tantrum spiral as the invaders split their sides laughing]]. While entropy will produce the wrong decision roughly 50% of the time, the Dwarven index will produce the wrong decision 99.7% of the time.

=== Summary of the Dwarven status quo ===
Dwarves are stupid.

== Discrepancies between Dwarven and traditional physics ==
The following items are possible in Dwarf Fortress, but impossible otherwise.

=== Dwarven perpetual motion device ===
As the name implies, this is a device that continuously generates power. Specifically, it generates power by building a [[water wheel]] in a [[waterfall]], then using said waterfall to power a [[screw pump]]. The screw pump is used to pump [[water]] back to its original [[Z-axis|Z-level]] and recycle it through the waterfall. Somehow, the device consistently generates a surplus of rotational energy.

=== Quantum garbage dumps ===
Perhaps the most common Dwarven anomaly, this is simply a 1x1 garbage [[dump]] zone, with massive amounts of items (usually [[stone]]) all contained in a single tile. The practicality is obvious—where else are you going to put all that stone?

=== Matter annihilation ===
Another common method of garbage disposal. Items and [[creature]]s in DF can be "annihilated" by placing them under a [[drawbridge]], and lowering the bridge. This is an example where the ''Dwarven Equation of Everything'' states that energy is ''not'' equal to mass times the speed of light squared. If the opposite was true, players would witness a massive explosion and a corresponding drop in FPS rate whenever an item was annihilated.

====Indestructible Ultra-fearsome-Vehicle====

One special case of the Matter annihilation: annihilating the Matter of a [[wagon]] is simply not possible, which not only could be seen as further argument, that Dwarven physics have no relations between Matter and energy, but also it means that there must be kind of "God-Matter". But the latter is concern of the [[philosopher]] and his Dwarven philosophy.

Others point out that this is simply because wagons are too large to crush - observant individuals have noted that other large creatures such as [[dragon]]s, [[giant]]s, and even [[elephant]]s and [[hippo]]s are similarly immune to the matter-annihilating power of the drawbridge.

=== Matter creation ===
The reverse of matter annihilation is creating something from nothing. Examples include:

:* Obtaining enough [[sand]] from one tile to build a giant fortress out of [[glass]]
:* Obtaining an infinite amount of [[water]] from a single [[aquifer]] wall, isolated from the rest of the aquifer
:* Forging metal [[bars]] into [[blocks]], increasing their mass by 25% in the process
:* [[Melt]]ing 25 individual metal bolts (which consumed 1 bar to make), and retrieving 2.5 metal bars from those.

=== General Relativity ===
It is also important to note that while relativity is indeed a proven phenomenon in Dwarven Physics, the catalyst for time dilation is not the speed an object moves at (as in traditional physics) but instead the population of its region. For decades, Dwarven Scientists have observed that, as local populations increase (dwarf, animal, or [[Waterfall|otherwise]]), the relative passage of time slows. To combat this, mayors have been known to enact ordinances ranging from the [[Maximizing framerate|simple and logical]] to the [[Catsplosion#Thermonuclear_catsplosion|ethically dubious]].

In a recent study by the Center for Dwarven Advancement, it was found that 40% of pioneer dwarves left the Mountainhome due to "framerate issues," with a margin of error of ±Booze.

=== Box of Everlasting Fire ===
Throughout man's history, fire has been used a super-weapon (Greek fire, flamethrowers, napalm). For the dwarves, this has manifested itself most notably with magma, and though fire typically consumes oxygen, [[Bin#Thermonuclear_Reaction|if contained within a magma-safe bin]], combustible materials immersed in magma become an infinitely-fueled source of [[fun]].

=== Super-Deadly Projectiles ===
Adventuring Dwarves have frequently noted that many objects can make quite effective projectile weapons. There have, in fact, been several documented cases of Dwarves pitching handfuls of vomit at elves, with deadly results. This is thought to be another manifestation of the ''Dwarven Equation of Life, the Universe, and Everything.'' In this case the (kinetic) energy of the thrown vomit increases without bound, often [[wound|causing the target's torso to explode in gore]]. However, it is also a distinct possibility that the act of throwing the vomit causes a hiccup in the space-time continuum, and actually causes the constant of light-speed to decrease everywhere except for the thrown vomit, essentially causing the covalent carbon bonds in the impact area to time warp and royally screwing over the unfortunate Elf. This curious anomaly has lead to adventurers winging any random crap that they can find in the general direction of their enemies. Some dwarves complain that this is "unethical fighting," but braining an [[Elf]] with a Live beetle is, in most cases, just too tempting to resist.

=== Indestructibile Constructions ===
All modern Dwarvish construction is based upon the principles of making materials indestructible. Dwarvish masons and carpenters are trained to make walls and floors with stone and wood, but are also capable of putting the material into a quantum state where they cannot be moved or destroyed by conventional means. Such technology has allowed incredible feats such as magma reservoirs made of wood, or 1x1 stone pillars that can hold up an entire metropolis without additional support. This phenomenon has also been observed in the other races (but to a much lesser extent.) Humans have a very primitive understanding of it, making little wood huts, but these are dwarfed in comparison to the various megaconstructs built by the dwarves. The Elves have an irrational moral code which prohibits them from altering the quantum state of wood (they say it's inhumane.) Even goblins have utilized this construction method. Ever since the beginning of Dwarven construction, sieging parties have tried to find ways of countering dwarven constructions, with little success. However, through trial and error, it has been found that if the construct does not have a direct physical link to the Earth in its current state, it becomes very unstable and reacts violently with the force of gravity, then it hurdles itself towards the ground with enough force to obliterate anything underneath it.

=== Urist McPauli Conditionnal Inclusion Principle ===

The pauli exclusion principle of Normal Quantum Physics (roughly) states that two elementary particle cannot occupy the same quantum state simultaneously. This prevents you from placing two object at the exact same place and holds your beer inside the barrel. The McPauli Conditionnal Inclusion Principle of Dwarven Quantum Physics however states that two particles May occupy the exact same spot without any interaction, depending on the final object they compose. For instance, it is possible to stack an unlimited amount of Wooden Short Swords in a one-cubic-meter space, but it is impossible to place two assembled wooden beds in that same space, even though they are composed of a small fraction of the same wood. This is an interesting example of Dwarven recursive logic where consequences lead to causes.

On a more theoretical (and less practical) side, it has been theorized that the workshops, where the wood is transformed into either short swords or bed, are actually quantum transformers where the basic properties of matter are altered : beds are made of standard, Pauli-compliant particles, while short swords are composed of non-fermionic thingies, although theire true composition remain uncertain.

== Dwarven Physics Mimetism ==
Physics Mimetism refers to the ability of dwarves to mimic real-world physical phenomenas. The most well-known example of physics mimetism is the [[tantrum]] spiraling, which is almost identical in principle to a nuclear chain reaction, with only a slight difference : although the reaction is extremely exothermic, you cannot use this energy to power screw pumps. Yet.

Besides this difference, nuclear chain reactions and tantrum chain reactions behave in a similar way : Dwarves take the role of nuclear fuel nucleis, unhappy thought are similar to neutrons (with properties actually close to neutrinos, even lead doors wont stop them) and various devices like awesome rooms, lavish meals and Booze serving as neutron moderators. When a dwarf nuclei undergo nuclear fission, it sends high-energy unhappy thought through the reaction chamber (the fortress). These unhappy thoughts interact with other dwarf nucleis and may cause more nuclear fissions, leading to a chain reaction where more and more Dwarves are tantruming. Fortunately, it is possible to moderate the effects of unhappy-thought-carrying-neutrinos by giving good, happy thoughts. The Most common moderator is booze, but other exists, although less efficient. Taking joy in slaughter was once a popular unhappy-thought moderator but is very dangerous to use as it can ''accelerate'' neutrons instead of slowing them when overheated. This was a prime cause of the catastrophic reaction of Dwarfnobyl which scattered deadly Elf settlements over a wide area (cleanup operations in progress).

[[Category:Physics]]
[[Category:Constructions]]

40d:Dwarven physics

2010-03-13T15:25:41Z

Booz:

{{D for dwarf}}

'''Dwarven physics''' is the study of how matter interacts with other matter within the world of Dwarf Fortress. Scholars of traditional Newtonian physics should note that Dwarven physics may or may not correspond with traditional Physics.

It is also worthy of mention that Dwarven physics is a highly complex subject, and thus only be approached by extremely intelligent, extremely curious, or extremely insane individuals.

==Overview==
Those familiar with traditional physics will recognize the following equation:

'''''E = mc2'''''

This equation, read from left to right, says: "Energy is equal to mass times the speed of light squared."

The following equation is known as the ''Dwarven Equation of Life, the Universe, and Everything'', and is the Dwarven adaption of the above:

'''''E''''' {{Dwarf|#fff|10px}} '''''mc2'''''

From left to right, it says: "Energy may or may not equal mass times the speed of light squared." Needless to say, there is a small amount of ambiguity when dealing with Dwarven physics. 

== The Dwarven method ==
The Dwarven method is a rubric by which experiments in Dwarf Fortress are conducted, but should not be confused with the Scientific method. Although the rigidity of the Dwarven method is disputed, the majority of important Dwarven experiments follow the Method. The Dwarven method consists of the following general guidelines: 

=== Sample size ===
Again, those familiar with traditional science may recognize the phrase, where it normally means, "The more the better." However, in Dwarven experiments, it means, "The '''''bigger''''' the better. For instance, a 500-meter magma fall is preferable to a 50-meter one. Now, if you had ''two'' 500-meter magma falls...

=== Repeatability ===
This is whether or not the experiment can be repeated, and if so, under what conditions. If there are few or no restrictions on repeatability, and your experiment receives the same results every time, it will likely be accepted as Dwarven fact. On the other hand, if said experiment can only be reproduced at infrequent or unpredictable intervals, and you were the only one to witness it, and you forgot to take a screenshot, and the experiment can only take place on your computer, and you mysteriously misplaced the savegame, your experiment will likely be dismissed as pointless drivel.

=== Dwarven factor ===
This factor is the approximate relative value of the prodigiousness of an experiment. Values must be real numbers, more specifically subsets of the Integer family. In layman's terms, the Dwarven factor is how awesome an experiment is. Keep in mind that the D-factor is relative, and thus intended to be compared with other values.

For instance, a cannon that shoots water may have a D-factor value of 100. However, if this cannon was constructed completely out of Adamantine, or if it was modified to shoot Magma instead, the D-factor may increase to several thousand, depending on the amount of magma used.

Note that a graph of the Dwarven factor may, and often will, asymptote. Vertical asymptotes are often seen when the D-factor of one experiment is just greater than that of another experiment.

Let us say that a hypothetical Player A constructed a catapult that hurls legendary Hammerdwarves at invaders, but Player B constructed a nearly identical catapult, except that it throws Zombie carp at invaders. Let us also say that the Zombie carp catapult has an assigned D-factor of 1,500. Both catapults ultimately accomplish the same task, (in this case, the complete annihilation of the invaders) but due to the inherent superiority of Zombie carp to hammerdwarves, (and everything else except Ironblood himself, booze, and magma) the Zombie carp catapult must have a higher D-factor than the other one. In this case, the D-factor graph of Catapult A will likely have an asymptote at 1,500. For those of you who aren't so calculus-savvy, this means that the D-factor of the "A" catapult will be approxamitely equal to 1,499.999999999, but will never reach 1,500.

Lastly, there is a direct correlation between the Dwarven factor and Sample size. Simply put, the bigger, the more Dwarvenly, ironic because the dwarves themselves are...small.

== The Dwarven status quo ==
The Dwarven index is strikingly similar to the concept of entropy. Although it involves chaos, the Index is more related with the innate stupidity of dwarves. A rough example of entropy is if a dwarf is given two decisions, and it is completely uncertain which one he will choose. (The concept of entropy relates loosely to the ''Dwarven Equation of Everything''.)

Even though it is similar to the concept of Entropy, the Dwarven index may produce different results, hence the differentiation between the two. The Dwarven index states, in a nutshell, that when a dwarf is faced with a decision he or she will make the ''wrong'' decision approximately 99.7% of the time. This could range from something minor like taking the long route to the kitchen, or to something like building a wall from the wrong side, getting stuck alone with a siege, ''dying a gory death'', and [[fun|sending the entirety of your fort into a massive tantrum spiral as the invaders split their sides laughing]]. While entropy will produce the wrong decision roughly 50% of the time, the Dwarven index will produce the wrong decision 99.7% of the time.

=== Summary of the Dwarven status quo ===
Dwarves are stupid.

== Discrepancies between Dwarven and traditional physics ==
The following items are possible in Dwarf Fortress, but impossible otherwise.

=== Dwarven perpetual motion device ===
As the name implies, this is a device that continuously generates power. Specifically, it generates power by building a [[water wheel]] in a [[waterfall]], then using said waterfall to power a [[screw pump]]. The screw pump is used to pump [[water]] back to its original [[Z-axis|Z-level]] and recycle it through the waterfall. Somehow, the device consistently generates a surplus of rotational energy.

=== Quantum garbage dumps ===
Perhaps the most common Dwarven anomaly, this is simply a 1x1 garbage [[dump]] zone, with massive amounts of items (usually [[stone]]) all contained in a single tile. The practicality is obvious—where else are you going to put all that stone?

=== Matter annihilation ===
Another common method of garbage disposal. Items and [[creature]]s in DF can be "annihilated" by placing them under a [[drawbridge]], and lowering the bridge. This is an example where the ''Dwarven Equation of Everything'' states that energy is ''not'' equal to mass times the speed of light squared. If the opposite was true, players would witness a massive explosion and a corresponding drop in FPS rate whenever an item was annihilated.

====Indestructible Ultra-fearsome-Vehicle====

One special case of the Matter annihilation: annihilating the Matter of a [[wagon]] is simply not possible, which not only could be seen as further argument, that Dwarven physics have no relations between Matter and energy, but also it means that there must be kind of "God-Matter". But the latter is concern of the [[philosopher]] and his Dwarven philosophy.

Others point out that this is simply because wagons are too large to crush - observant individuals have noted that other large creatures such as [[dragon]]s, [[giant]]s, and even [[elephant]]s and [[hippo]]s are similarly immune to the matter-annihilating power of the drawbridge.

=== Matter creation ===
The reverse of matter annihilation is creating something from nothing. Examples include:

:* Obtaining enough [[sand]] from one tile to build a giant fortress out of [[glass]]
:* Obtaining an infinite amount of [[water]] from a single [[aquifer]] wall, isolated from the rest of the aquifer
:* Forging metal [[bars]] into [[blocks]], increasing their mass by 25% in the process
:* [[Melt]]ing 25 individual metal bolts (which consumed 1 bar to make), and retrieving 2.5 metal bars from those.

=== General Relativity ===
It is also important to note that while relativity is indeed a proven phenomenon in Dwarven Physics, the catalyst for time dilation is not the speed an object moves at (as in traditional physics) but instead the population of its region. For decades, Dwarven Scientists have observed that, as local populations increase (dwarf, animal, or [[Waterfall|otherwise]]), the relative passage of time slows. To combat this, mayors have been known to enact ordinances ranging from the [[Maximizing framerate|simple and logical]] to the [[Catsplosion#Thermonuclear_catsplosion|ethically dubious]].

In a recent study by the Center for Dwarven Advancement, it was found that 40% of pioneer dwarves left the Mountainhome due to "framerate issues," with a margin of error of ±Booze.

=== Box of Everlasting Fire ===
Throughout man's history, fire has been used a super-weapon (Greek fire, flamethrowers, napalm). For the dwarves, this has manifested itself most notably with magma, and though fire typically consumes oxygen, [[Bin#Thermonuclear_Reaction|if contained within a magma-safe bin]], combustible materials immersed in magma become an infinitely-fueled source of [[fun]].

=== Super-Deadly Projectiles ===
Adventuring Dwarves have frequently noted that many objects can make quite effective projectile weapons. There have, in fact, been several documented cases of Dwarves pitching handfuls of vomit at elves, with deadly results. This is thought to be another manifestation of the ''Dwarven Equation of Life, the Universe, and Everything.'' In this case the (kinetic) energy of the thrown vomit increases without bound, often [[wound|causing the target's torso to explode in gore]]. However, it is also a distinct possibility that the act of throwing the vomit causes a hiccup in the space-time continuum, and actually causes the constant of light-speed to decrease everywhere except for the thrown vomit, essentially causing the covalent carbon bonds in the impact area to time warp and royally screwing over the unfortunate Elf. This curious anomaly has lead to adventurers winging any random crap that they can find in the general direction of their enemies. Some dwarves complain that this is "unethical fighting," but braining an [[Elf]] with a Live beetle is, in most cases, just too tempting to resist.

=== Indestructibile Constructions ===
All modern Dwarvish construction is based upon the principles of making materials indestructible. Dwarvish masons and carpenters are trained to make walls and floors with stone and wood, but are also capable of putting the material into a quantum state where they cannot be moved or destroyed by conventional means. Such technology has allowed incredible feats such as magma reservoirs made of wood, or 1x1 stone pillars that can hold up an entire metropolis without additional support. This phenomenon has also been observed in the other races (but to a much lesser extent.) Humans have a very primitive understanding of it, making little wood huts, but these are dwarfed in comparison to the various megaconstructs built by the dwarves. The Elves have an irrational moral code which prohibits them from altering the quantum state of wood (they say it's inhumane.) Even goblins have utilized this construction method. Ever since the beginning of Dwarven construction, sieging parties have tried to find ways of countering dwarven constructions, with little success. However, through trial and error, it has been found that if the construct does not have a direct physical link to the Earth in its current state, it becomes very unstable and reacts violently with the force of gravity, then it hurdles itself towards the ground with enough force to obliterate anything underneath it.

== Dwarven Physics Mimetism ==
Physics Mimetism refers to the ability of dwarves to mimic real-world physical phenomenas. The most well-known example of physics mimetism is the [[tantrum]] spiraling, which is almost identical in principle to a nuclear chain reaction, with only a slight difference : although the reaction is extremely exothermic, you cannot use this energy to power screw pumps. Yet.

Besides this difference, nuclear chain reactions and tantrum chain reactions behave in a similar way : Dwarves take the role of nuclear fuel nucleis, unhappy thought are similar to neutrons (with properties actually close to neutrinos, even lead doors wont stop them) and various devices like awesome rooms, lavish meals and Booze serving as neutron moderators. When a dwarf nuclei undergo nuclear fission, it sends high-energy unhappy thought through the reaction chamber (the fortress). These unhappy thoughts interact with other dwarf nucleis and may cause more nuclear fissions, leading to a chain reaction where more and more Dwarves are tantruming. Fortunately, it is possible to moderate the effects of unhappy-thought-carrying-neutrinos by giving good, happy thoughts. The Most common moderator is booze, but other exists, although less efficient. Taking joy in slaughter was once a popular unhappy-thought moderator but is very dangerous to use as it can ''accelerate'' neutrons instead of slowing them when overheated. This was a prime cause of the catastrophic reaction of Dwarfnobyl which scattered deadly Elf settlements over a wide area (cleanup operations in progress).

[[Category:Physics]]
[[Category:Constructions]]

40d:Dwarven physics

2010-03-13T15:24:39Z

Booz:

{{D for dwarf}}

'''Dwarven physics''' is the study of how matter interacts with other matter within the world of Dwarf Fortress. Scholars of traditional Newtonian physics should note that Dwarven physics may or may not correspond with traditional Physics.

It is also worthy of mention that Dwarven physics is a highly complex subject, and thus only be approached by extremely intelligent, extremely curious, or extremely insane individuals.

==Overview==
Those familiar with traditional physics will recognize the following equation:

'''''E = mc2'''''

This equation, read from left to right, says: "Energy is equal to mass times the speed of light squared."

The following equation is known as the ''Dwarven Equation of Life, the Universe, and Everything'', and is the Dwarven adaption of the above:

'''''E''''' {{Dwarf|#fff|10px}} '''''mc2'''''

From left to right, it says: "Energy may or may not equal mass times the speed of light squared." Needless to say, there is a small amount of ambiguity when dealing with Dwarven physics. 

== The Dwarven method ==
The Dwarven method is a rubric by which experiments in Dwarf Fortress are conducted, but should not be confused with the Scientific method. Although the rigidity of the Dwarven method is disputed, the majority of important Dwarven experiments follow the Method. The Dwarven method consists of the following general guidelines: 

=== Sample size ===
Again, those familiar with traditional science may recognize the phrase, where it normally means, "The more the better." However, in Dwarven experiments, it means, "The '''''bigger''''' the better. For instance, a 500-meter magma fall is preferable to a 50-meter one. Now, if you had ''two'' 500-meter magma falls...

=== Repeatability ===
This is whether or not the experiment can be repeated, and if so, under what conditions. If there are few or no restrictions on repeatability, and your experiment receives the same results every time, it will likely be accepted as Dwarven fact. On the other hand, if said experiment can only be reproduced at infrequent or unpredictable intervals, and you were the only one to witness it, and you forgot to take a screenshot, and the experiment can only take place on your computer, and you mysteriously misplaced the savegame, your experiment will likely be dismissed as pointless drivel.

=== Dwarven factor ===
This factor is the approximate relative value of the prodigiousness of an experiment. Values must be real numbers, more specifically subsets of the Integer family. In layman's terms, the Dwarven factor is how awesome an experiment is. Keep in mind that the D-factor is relative, and thus intended to be compared with other values.

For instance, a cannon that shoots water may have a D-factor value of 100. However, if this cannon was constructed completely out of Adamantine, or if it was modified to shoot Magma instead, the D-factor may increase to several thousand, depending on the amount of magma used.

Note that a graph of the Dwarven factor may, and often will, asymptote. Vertical asymptotes are often seen when the D-factor of one experiment is just greater than that of another experiment.

Let us say that a hypothetical Player A constructed a catapult that hurls legendary Hammerdwarves at invaders, but Player B constructed a nearly identical catapult, except that it throws Zombie carp at invaders. Let us also say that the Zombie carp catapult has an assigned D-factor of 1,500. Both catapults ultimately accomplish the same task, (in this case, the complete annihilation of the invaders) but due to the inherent superiority of Zombie carp to hammerdwarves, (and everything else except Ironblood himself, booze, and magma) the Zombie carp catapult must have a higher D-factor than the other one. In this case, the D-factor graph of Catapult A will likely have an asymptote at 1,500. For those of you who aren't so calculus-savvy, this means that the D-factor of the "A" catapult will be approxamitely equal to 1,499.999999999, but will never reach 1,500.

Lastly, there is a direct correlation between the Dwarven factor and Sample size. Simply put, the bigger, the more Dwarvenly, ironic because the dwarves themselves are...small.

== The Dwarven status quo ==
The Dwarven index is strikingly similar to the concept of entropy. Although it involves chaos, the Index is more related with the innate stupidity of dwarves. A rough example of entropy is if a dwarf is given two decisions, and it is completely uncertain which one he will choose. (The concept of entropy relates loosely to the ''Dwarven Equation of Everything''.)

Even though it is similar to the concept of Entropy, the Dwarven index may produce different results, hence the differentiation between the two. The Dwarven index states, in a nutshell, that when a dwarf is faced with a decision he or she will make the ''wrong'' decision approximately 99.7% of the time. This could range from something minor like taking the long route to the kitchen, or to something like building a wall from the wrong side, getting stuck alone with a siege, ''dying a gory death'', and [[fun|sending the entirety of your fort into a massive tantrum spiral as the invaders split their sides laughing]]. While entropy will produce the wrong decision roughly 50% of the time, the Dwarven index will produce the wrong decision 99.7% of the time.

=== Summary of the Dwarven status quo ===
Dwarves are stupid.

== Discrepancies between Dwarven and traditional physics ==
The following items are possible in Dwarf Fortress, but impossible otherwise.

=== Dwarven perpetual motion device ===
As the name implies, this is a device that continuously generates power. Specifically, it generates power by building a [[water wheel]] in a [[waterfall]], then using said waterfall to power a [[screw pump]]. The screw pump is used to pump [[water]] back to its original [[Z-axis|Z-level]] and recycle it through the waterfall. Somehow, the device consistently generates a surplus of rotational energy.

=== Quantum garbage dumps ===
Perhaps the most common Dwarven anomaly, this is simply a 1x1 garbage [[dump]] zone, with massive amounts of items (usually [[stone]]) all contained in a single tile. The practicality is obvious—where else are you going to put all that stone?

=== Matter annihilation ===
Another common method of garbage disposal. Items and [[creature]]s in DF can be "annihilated" by placing them under a [[drawbridge]], and lowering the bridge. This is an example where the ''Dwarven Equation of Everything'' states that energy is ''not'' equal to mass times the speed of light squared. If the opposite was true, players would witness a massive explosion and a corresponding drop in FPS rate whenever an item was annihilated.

====Indestructible Ultra-fearsome-Vehicle====

One special case of the Matter annihilation: annihilating the Matter of a [[wagon]] is simply not possible, which not only could be seen as further argument, that Dwarven physics have no relations between Matter and energy, but also it means that there must be kind of "God-Matter". But the latter is concern of the [[philosopher]] and his Dwarven philosophy.

Others point out that this is simply because wagons are too large to crush - observant individuals have noted that other large creatures such as [[dragon]]s, [[giant]]s, and even [[elephant]]s and [[hippo]]s are similarly immune to the matter-annihilating power of the drawbridge.

=== Matter creation ===
The reverse of matter annihilation is creating something from nothing. Examples include:

:* Obtaining enough [[sand]] from one tile to build a giant fortress out of [[glass]]
:* Obtaining an infinite amount of [[water]] from a single [[aquifer]] wall, isolated from the rest of the aquifer
:* Forging metal [[bars]] into [[blocks]], increasing their mass by 25% in the process
:* [[Melt]]ing 25 individual metal bolts (which consumed 1 bar to make), and retrieving 2.5 metal bars from those.

=== General Relativity ===
It is also important to note that while relativity is indeed a proven phenomenon in Dwarven Physics, the catalyst for time dilation is not the speed an object moves at (as in traditional physics) but instead the population of its region. For decades, Dwarven Scientists have observed that, as local populations increase (dwarf, animal, or [[Waterfall|otherwise]]), the relative passage of time slows. To combat this, mayors have been known to enact ordinances ranging from the [[Maximizing framerate|simple and logical]] to the [[Catsplosion#Thermonuclear_catsplosion|ethically dubious]].

In a recent study by the Center for Dwarven Advancement, it was found that 40% of pioneer dwarves left the Mountainhome due to "framerate issues," with a margin of error of ±Booze.

=== Box of Everlasting Fire ===
Throughout man's history, fire has been used a super-weapon (Greek fire, flamethrowers, napalm). For the dwarves, this has manifested itself most notably with magma, and though fire typically consumes oxygen, [[Bin#Thermonuclear_Reaction|if contained within a magma-safe bin]], combustible materials immersed in magma become an infinitely-fueled source of [[fun]].

=== Super-Deadly Projectiles ===
Adventuring Dwarves have frequently noted that many objects can make quite effective projectile weapons. There have, in fact, been several documented cases of Dwarves pitching handfuls of vomit at elves, with deadly results. This is thought to be another manifestation of the ''Dwarven Equation of Life, the Universe, and Everything.'' In this case the (kinetic) energy of the thrown vomit increases without bound, often [[wound|causing the target's torso to explode in gore]]. However, it is also a distinct possibility that the act of throwing the vomit causes a hiccup in the space-time continuum, and actually causes the constant of light-speed to decrease everywhere except for the thrown vomit, essentially causing the covalent carbon bonds in the impact area to time warp and royally screwing over the unfortunate Elf. This curious anomaly has lead to adventurers winging any random crap that they can find in the general direction of their enemies. Some dwarves complain that this is "unethical fighting," but braining an [[Elf]] with a Live beetle is, in most cases, just too tempting to resist.

=== Indestructibile Constructions ===
All modern Dwarvish construction is based upon the principles of making materials indestructible. Dwarvish masons and carpenters are trained to make walls and floors with stone and wood, but are also capable of putting the material into a quantum state where they cannot be moved or destroyed by conventional means. Such technology has allowed incredible feats such as magma reservoirs made of wood, or 1x1 stone pillars that can hold up an entire metropolis without additional support. This phenomenon has also been observed in the other races (but to a much lesser extent.) Humans have a very primitive understanding of it, making little wood huts, but these are dwarfed in comparison to the various megaconstructs built by the dwarves. The Elves have an irrational moral code which prohibits them from altering the quantum state of wood (they say it's inhumane.) Even goblins have utilized this construction method. Ever since the beginning of Dwarven construction, sieging parties have tried to find ways of countering dwarven constructions, with little success. However, through trial and error, it has been found that if the construct does not have a direct physical link to the Earth in its current state, it becomes very unstable and reacts violently with the force of gravity, then it hurdles itself towards the ground with enough force to obliterate anything underneath it.

== Dwarven Physics Mimetism ==
Physics Mimetism refers to the ability of dwarves to mimic real-world physical phenomenas. The most well-known example of physics mimetism is the [[tantrum spiraling]], which is almost identical in principle to a nuclear chain reaction, with only a slight difference : although the reaction is extremely exothermic, you cannot use this energy to power screw pumps. Yet.

Besides this difference, nuclear chain reactions and tantrum chain reactions behave in a similar way : Dwarves take the role of nuclear fuel nucleis, unhappy thought are similar to neutrons (with properties actually close to neutrinos, even lead doors wont stop them) and various devices like awesome rooms, lavish meals and Booze serving as neutron moderators. When a dwarf nuclei undergo nuclear fission, it sends high-energy unhappy thought through the reaction chamber (the fortress). These unhappy thoughts interact with other dwarf nucleis and may cause more nuclear fissions, leading to a chain reaction where more and more Dwarves are tantruming. Fortunately, it is possible to moderate the effects of unhappy-thought-carrying-neutrinos by giving good, happy thoughts. The Most common moderator is booze, but other exists, although less efficient. Taking joy in slaughter was once a popular unhappy-thought moderator but is very dangerous to use as it can ''accelerate'' neutrons instead of slowing them when overheated. This was a prime cause of the catastrophic reaction of Dwarfnobyl which scattered deadly Elf settlements over a wide area (cleanup operations in progress).

[[Category:Physics]]
[[Category:Constructions]]

40d:Dwarven physics

2010-03-12T21:55:06Z

Booz:

{{D for dwarf}}

'''Dwarven physics''' is the study of how matter interacts with other matter within the world of Dwarf Fortress. Scholars of traditional Newtonian physics should note that Dwarven physics may or may not correspond with traditional Physics.

It is also worthy of mention that Dwarven physics is a highly complex subject, and thus only be approached by extremely intelligent, extremely curious, or extremely insane individuals.

==Overview==
Those familiar with traditional physics will recognize the following equation:

'''''E = mc2'''''

This equation, read from left to right, says: "Energy is equal to mass times the speed of light squared."

The following equation is known as the ''Dwarven Equation of Life, the Universe, and Everything'', and is the Dwarven adaption of the above:

'''''E''''' {{Dwarf|#fff|10px}} '''''mc2'''''

From left to right, it says: "Energy may or may not equal mass times the speed of light squared." Needless to say, there is a small amount of ambiguity when dealing with Dwarven physics. 

== The Dwarven method ==
The Dwarven method is a rubric by which experiments in Dwarf Fortress are conducted, but should not be confused with the Scientific method. Although the rigidity of the Dwarven method is disputed, the majority of important Dwarven experiments follow the Method. The Dwarven method consists of the following general guidelines: 

=== Sample size ===
Again, those familiar with traditional science may recognize the phrase, where it normally means, "The more the better." However, in Dwarven experiments, it means, "The '''''bigger''''' the better. For instance, a 500-meter magma fall is preferable to a 50-meter one. Now, if you had ''two'' 500-meter magma falls...

=== Repeatability ===
This is whether or not the experiment can be repeated, and if so, under what conditions. If there are few or no restrictions on repeatability, and your experiment receives the same results every time, it will likely be accepted as Dwarven fact. On the other hand, if said experiment can only be reproduced at infrequent or unpredictable intervals, and you were the only one to witness it, and you forgot to take a screenshot, and the experiment can only take place on your computer, and you mysteriously misplaced the savegame, your experiment will likely be dismissed as pointless drivel.

=== Dwarven factor ===
This factor is the approximate relative value of the prodigiousness of an experiment. Values must be real numbers, more specifically subsets of the Integer family. In layman's terms, the Dwarven factor is how awesome an experiment is. Keep in mind that the D-factor is relative, and thus intended to be compared with other values.

For instance, a cannon that shoots water may have a D-factor value of 100. However, if this cannon was constructed completely out of Adamantine, or if it was modified to shoot Magma instead, the D-factor may increase to several thousand, depending on the amount of magma used.

Note that a graph of the Dwarven factor may, and often will, asymptote. Vertical asymptotes are often seen when the D-factor of one experiment is just greater than that of another experiment.

Let us say that a hypothetical Player A constructed a catapult that hurls legendary Hammerdwarves at invaders, but Player B constructed a nearly identical catapult, except that it throws Zombie carp at invaders. Let us also say that the Zombie carp catapult has an assigned D-factor of 1,500. Both catapults ultimately accomplish the same task, (in this case, the complete annihilation of the invaders) but due to the inherent superiority of Zombie carp to hammerdwarves, (and everything else except Ironblood himself, booze, and magma) the Zombie carp catapult must have a higher D-factor than the other one. In this case, the D-factor graph of Catapult A will likely have an asymptote at 1,500. For those of you who aren't so calculus-savvy, this means that the D-factor of the "A" catapult will be approxamitely equal to 1,499.999999999, but will never reach 1,500.

Lastly, there is a direct correlation between the Dwarven factor and Sample size. Simply put, the bigger, the more Dwarvenly, ironic because the dwarves themselves are...small.

== The Dwarven status quo ==
The Dwarven index is strikingly similar to the concept of entropy. Although it involves chaos, the Index is more related with the innate stupidity of dwarves. A rough example of entropy is if a dwarf is given two decisions, and it is completely uncertain which one he will choose. (The concept of entropy relates loosely to the ''Dwarven Equation of Everything''.)

Even though it is similar to the concept of Entropy, the Dwarven index may produce different results, hence the differentiation between the two. The Dwarven index states, in a nutshell, that when a dwarf is faced with a decision he or she will make the ''wrong'' decision approximately 99.7% of the time. This could range from something minor like taking the long route to the kitchen, or to something like building a wall from the wrong side, getting stuck alone with a siege, ''dying a gory death'', and [[fun|sending the entirety of your fort into a massive tantrum spiral as the invaders split their sides laughing]]. While entropy will produce the wrong decision roughly 50% of the time, the Dwarven index will produce the wrong decision 99.7% of the time.

=== Summary of the Dwarven status quo ===
Dwarves are stupid.

== Discrepancies between Dwarven and traditional physics ==
The following items are possible in Dwarf Fortress, but impossible otherwise.

=== Dwarven perpetual motion device ===
As the name implies, this is a device that continuously generates power. Specifically, it generates power by building a [[water wheel]] in a [[waterfall]], then using said waterfall to power a [[screw pump]]. The screw pump is used to pump [[water]] back to its original [[Z-axis|Z-level]] and recycle it through the waterfall. Somehow, the device consistently generates a surplus of rotational energy.

=== Quantum garbage dumps ===
Perhaps the most common Dwarven anomaly, this is simply a 1x1 garbage [[dump]] zone, with massive amounts of items (usually [[stone]]) all contained in a single tile. The practicality is obvious—where else are you going to put all that stone?

=== Matter annihilation ===
Another common method of garbage disposal. Items and [[creature]]s in DF can be "annihilated" by placing them under a [[drawbridge]], and lowering the bridge. This is an example where the ''Dwarven Equation of Everything'' states that energy is ''not'' equal to mass times the speed of light squared. If the opposite was true, players would witness a massive explosion and a corresponding drop in FPS rate whenever an item was annihilated.

====Indestructible Ultra-fearsome-Vehicle====

One special case of the Matter annihilation: annihilating the Matter of a [[wagon]] is simply not possible, which not only could be seen as further argument, that Dwarven physics have no relations between Matter and energy, but also it means that there must be kind of "God-Matter". But the latter is concern of the [[philosopher]] and his Dwarven philosophy.

Others point out that this is simply because wagons are too large to crush - observant individuals have noted that other large creatures such as [[dragon]]s, [[giant]]s, and even [[elephant]]s and [[hippo]]s are similarly immune to the matter-annihilating power of the drawbridge.

=== Matter creation ===
The reverse of matter annihilation is creating something from nothing. Examples include:

:* Obtaining enough [[sand]] from one tile to build a giant fortress out of [[glass]]
:* Obtaining an infinite amount of [[water]] from a single [[aquifer]] wall, isolated from the rest of the aquifer
:* Forging metal [[bars]] into [[blocks]], increasing their mass by 25% in the process
:* [[Melt]]ing 25 individual metal bolts (which consumed 1 bar to make), and retrieving 2.5 metal bars from those.

=== General Relativity ===
It is also important to note that while relativity is indeed a proven phenomenon in Dwarven Physics, the catalyst for time dilation is not the speed an object moves at (as in traditional physics) but instead the population of its region. For decades, Dwarven Scientists have observed that, as local populations increase (dwarf, animal, or [[Waterfall|otherwise]]), the relative passage of time slows. To combat this, mayors have been known to enact ordinances ranging from the [[Maximizing framerate|simple and logical]] to the [[Catsplosion#Thermonuclear_catsplosion|ethically dubious]].

In a recent study by the Center for Dwarven Advancement, it was found that 40% of pioneer dwarves left the Mountainhome due to "framerate issues," with a margin of error of ±Booze.

=== Box of Everlasting Fire ===
Throughout man's history, fire has been used a super-weapon (Greek fire, flamethrowers, napalm). For the dwarves, this has manifested itself most notably with magma, and though fire typically consumes oxygen, [[Bin#Thermonuclear_Reaction|if contained within a magma-safe bin]], combustible materials immersed in magma become an infinitely-fueled source of [[fun]].

=== Super-Deadly Projectiles ===
Adventuring Dwarves have frequently noted that many objects can make quite effective projectile weapons. There have, in fact, been several documented cases of Dwarves pitching handfuls of vomit at elves, with deadly results. This is thought to be another manifestation of the ''Dwarven Equation of Life, the Universe, and Everything.'' In this case the (kinetic) energy of the thrown vomit increases without bound, often [[wound|causing the target's torso to explode in gore]]. However, it is also a distinct possibility that the act of throwing the vomit causes a hiccup in the space-time continuum, and actually causes the constant of light-speed to decrease everywhere except for the thrown vomit, essentially causing the covalent carbon bonds in the impact area to time warp and royally screwing over the unfortunate Elf. This curious anomaly has lead to adventurers winging any random crap that they can find in the general direction of their enemies. Some dwarves complain that this is "unethical fighting," but braining an [[Elf]] with a Live beetle is, in most cases, just too tempting to resist.

=== Indestructibile Constructions ===
All modern Dwarvish construction is based upon the principles of making materials indestructible. Dwarvish masons and carpenters are trained to make walls and floors with stone and wood, but are also capable of putting the material into a quantum state where they cannot be moved or destroyed by conventional means. Such technology has allowed incredible feats such as magma reservoirs made of wood, or 1x1 stone pillars that can hold up an entire metropolis without additional support. This phenomenon has also been observed in the other races (but to a much lesser extent.) Humans have a very primitive understanding of it, making little wood huts, but these are dwarfed in comparison to the various megaconstructs built by the dwarves. The Elves have an irrational moral code which prohibits them from altering the quantum state of wood (they say it's inhumane.) Even goblins have utilized this construction method. Ever since the beginning of Dwarven construction, sieging parties have tried to find ways of countering dwarven constructions, with little success. However, through trial and error, it has been found that if the construct does not have a direct physical link to the Earth in its current state, it becomes very unstable and reacts violently with the force of gravity, then it hurdles itself towards the ground with enough force to obliterate anything underneath it.

== Dwarven Physics Mimetism ==
Physics Mimetism refers to the ability of dwarves to mimic real-world pysical phenomenas. The most well-known example of physics mimetism is the tantrum spiraling, which is almost identical in principle to a nuclear chain reaction, with only a slight difference : although the reaction is extremely exothermic, you cannot use this energy to power screw pumps. Yet.

Besides this difference, nuclear chain reactions and tantrum chain reactions behave in a similar way : Dwarves take the role of nuclear fuel nucleis, unhappy thought are similar to neutrons (with properties actually close to neutrinos, even lead doors wont stop them) and various devices like awesome rooms, lavish meals and Booze serving as neutron moderators. When a dwarf nuclei undergo nuclear fission, it sends high-energy unhappy thought through the reaction chamber (the fortress). These unhappy thoughts interact with other dwarf nucleis and may cause more nuclear fissions, leading to a chain reaction where more and more Dwarves are tantruming. Fortunately, it is possible to moderate the effects of unhappy-thought-carrying-neutrinos by giving good, happy thoughts. The Most common moderator is booze, but other exists, although less efficient. Taking joy in slaughter was once a popular unhappy-thought moderator but is very dangerous to use as it can ''accelerate'' neutrons instead of slowing them when overheated. This was a prime cause of the catastrophic reaction of Dwarfnobyl which scattered deadly Elf settlements over a wide area (cleanup operations in progress).

[[Category:Physics]]
[[Category:Constructions]]

40d:Challenges

2009-09-10T19:35:53Z

Booz:

:''Part of this article was originally taken from the DF forums thread [http://www.bay12games.com/forum/index.php?topic=466.0 "Goal-Based Dwarf Fortress"].''

The general goal of [[Fortress Mode]] is to survive, acquire wealth, defend your stronghold, and become the capital of your civilization. However, many players find that fighting off repeated [[siege|sieges]], keeping their people alive, and expanding just aren't enough anymore. They begin to experiment with different sets of starting builds, arbitrary requirements and restrictions, and even feats of construction to appease Armok, in search of more difficulty and [[fun]]. These are some goals to attempt or use as inspiration.

==Pre-Embark Build Ideas==
Before you embark, you can optimize or sabotage your fortress from the very start, depending on how you distribute your points. After a few years, a well-developing fortress may or may not stabilize (depending on your idea of [[fun]]), leaving you to other challenges.

=== Diplomacy ===
* Six dwarves with only social [[skill]]s
* One skilled dwarf

Six courtiers of the king's court made some ill-advised remarks within earshot of the king, and as a result have been ordered to go found an outpost. They've hired you to make sure they survive. The six nobles only have social skills and refuse to do any work that is beneath them.

=== Minimalist/Survivalist build===

:* 1 anvil
:* 2 copper ore

Nothing else. From that alone, forge your pick and axe. (Figure it out yourself, or see the [[DIY#Minimalist_challenge_build|Do it Yourself]] article for a step-by-step "how to".)

===Peasantry===
* Spend 0 Points on embark

This challenge is moderately to very difficult, depending on the wildlife and outdoor food sources. Note that the three logs from the wagon are just enough to build a trade depot.

=== Stranded Scout Squad ===
* Military skills
* Weapons, ammunition, armor, war dogs
* Picks are not weapons

Your civilian 'friends' promised a caravan in the fall as they left, laughing. Hopefully, you can survive until then with your forward scouts.

==Races==
Pretend to be another race! You can mod the game or just pretend that Elves have hair. It doesn't matter what you look like, just what you build, with what materials, and what's for lunch after we build it.

===Elves - The Ultimate Hippy Challenge===
Peace, man.
* Don't gather plants except those you plant yourself.
* Don't gather wood nor trade for it with humans or dwarves.
* Trade for plants and wood only with the elves; they understand your environmental code.
* Don't burn any [[fuel|coal]]. Do you know what that does to the environment, man?
**Magma-smelting is an option, but steel can't be had.
* Don't cause any creature's death, even in self-defense.
**No military, induced submerging, or lethal implementation of corkscrews.
* Only use cage traps, and either tame the creatures you catch, or release them back into the wild.
* [[Elf|Hippies]] prefer sunlight and wooded areas, with minimal use of rock (digging and building).

For an extra challenge try this in an area with a cave.

===Humans - Living Large and Standing Tall===
Pretend you're a filthy above-ground dwelling [[Human|humie]].
* Build a town wall.
** Only hovels and farms outside the town walls.
* House your dwarves in small town homes
** 5-10 dwarves per house (they had pretty big families back in the day)
** Upstairs bedrooms, small dining room, maybe a single level basement.
* House your workshops according to profession, not convenience.
* Build warehouses for stockpiles, and set guards outside them.
* Create a keep, with its own wall, barracks, treasury, etc.
** House your nobles within the keep.
* Create a market square.
* Create a main street from the town wall to the market square and/or keep. Well-paved blocks, statues and decorative shubbery are a must.
* No underground connections between different areas.
* For obtaining stone, metal, etc. a mine may be built, but must have separate entrance from other buildings. It can be outside the fortress, but must not connect to the interior, or vice versa.
** If you create a side hill mine, only carve larges (at least 2 tiles) tunnels, and create shaft to the surface to allow air circulation.
** Or better than that, create an open pit mine / quarry, with ramps to access lower floors.
* BONUS: Miniproject: Build a large, multiple-z-level fountain complete with decorations.
* BONUS: Miniproject: Human Inn, containing your only booze stockpile and should be party-oriented.
* BONUS: Miniproject: Farm simulation, complete with crops and free-range livestock, etc.
* BONUS: Easy Play: Embark on top of a Human Town.
* BONUS: Advanced Play: Modify the raws and actually use humans to make the fort.
* MEGABONUS: Build your entire fortress as [[mega constructions|one huge arcology]].
* MEGABONUS: Build your City in a giant, artifical cave.

===Luddite===
Shun technology and contraptions. Who can really trust them, with those [[Gremlin|gremlins]] around. This may be challenging, as it forbids easy isolation/defense from attacks, all traps and wells. Irrigation is reduced to solid elbow grease and maybe a bucket or two. This challenge may be even harder combined with another challenge.
* No mechanics or [[mechanism]]s
* No [[machine]]s

==Utter Dwarfiness==
Need new ways to behave or new techniques to dip your toes into? Give any or all of your starting 7 some quirks to live up to. Want to try making your Boss a hell-bent, paranoid despot? Or establish a routine mass murder of small animals to provide your fort with raw meat by a vaguely intimidating, estranged butcher?

===Bandit Camp===
* Three or more Marksdwarves (perhaps with [[Ambush|ambushing]])
* Embark site featuring places to hide

Attack and loot every enemy sentient creature you can find, such as goblins & kobolds. Develop sneaky and even horrific methods of trapping and 'processing' friendly sentients (merchants, diplomats, and even migrants). Take no prisoners and leave no evidence of foul play.

===City-States===
* All dwarves embark as peasants
* 7 or multiple of 7 of everything you bring (especially picks and axes)

At the start your dwarves split everything equally and move to 7 different locales that are not interconnected. They have to mine their own rooms, plant their own crops, use their own craft piles. This will probably require a bit of cross-fertilization until you get [[door]]s and can lock everyone in, but after that it is every dwarf for him/herself!

This challenge may be easier to perform after Burrows are implemented.

===Equaland===
* No embark requirements
* Construct a successful fortress
* All dwarves are given equal attention regarding quarters, dining, armament and burial
* One dwarf elected to be "The Leader" commands a lever system capable of killing a single dwarf of your choice in their room, however you wish
* Allow the Leader (your id) free reign on his power, enforcing impossible and unannounced criteria on your other dwarves with death being the only punishment

===Hermit===
* Spend points ONLY on ONE [[Pick]]

A well known and popular challenge. Kill off 6 starting dwarves and any [[immigrants]] as they arrive, and try to make a living for the last dwarf. Turn away merchants. If they don't leave, kill them.

'''Variants'''
To moderate difficulty, feel free to allow these exceptions:
* Keep your starting seven, but no immigrants.
* Selectively admit dwarves based on name, profession, etc.
* Embark with an anvil as well.

===Hunting Party===
* One Marksman+Ambusher
* One Cook+Farmer
* One Brewer+Farmer
* Four exclusively social dwarves
* Embark with no anvil, many hunting dogs, into a challenging biome (terrifying areas may have no supply of wood)

===Immigration and customs enforcement===
* One miner/mason/architect
* One woodcutter/carpenter/architect
* Five military dwarves
* Embark into a canyon or on a road
* Don't embark with an anvil

Spend the first year building fortifications to interdict traffic. Immigrants can build a town around you, but your original seven dwarves remain dedicated to their mission (purely military in purpose).

===Master Of One===
Pre-Embark:
* All starting dwarves must have only one skill

Post-Embark:
* No changes are allowed on any dwarf's labor screen, except to ''disable'' hauling labors (enabling hauling is forbidden)
* All immigrants must stay with the profession(s) they arrive with
* All peasants must be activated into the military

===Monarch with a grudge===
* Forbid any and all use of stone and metal
* No exposed tile may be labeled "Underground"
* Artifacts containing stone and metal are to be destroyed '''utterly''' (magma or the [[Dwarven_Atom_Smasher|DAS]]

"Nay, no ponderous stone doors or shining silver arcades, not while I live!"
The new king has decided rocks and metals can no longer be used in construction. He'll be overthrown shortly, but in the meantime construct your fortress without them.

'''Variants'''
* Embark with no construction materials, into an area devoid of trees.
* Construct a fortress made entirely out of glass. Try not using magma or limit yourself only to clear and crystal glass.
* Build with soap bars. Show those elven traders just how much you despise their philosophies by building with stuff derived from dead trees ''and'' dead animals. Cats are an excellent source of tallow.
* Choose one type of rock, one type of metal, one type of gem, one type of wood, and optionally one type of glass. All constructions can only use those types in their construction. An easy way to enforce this with stone is to mark all but your choice "Economical".
* Bonus points: Stone is forbidden along with digging

===Noblesse requiro===
* Construct a fortress only to please nobles (who, for the sake of this challenge, are all criminally psychotic)
* Criminals who deserve justice should be incarcerated, tortured, and executed for ''any'' offense. Use your imagination for every step of the process. Remember, there is no right to a fair and speedy trial in Armok's eyes.
* All Nobles must be treated to the highest quality living conditions
* All others must be treated to the bare minimum needed to physically keep them alive
* Elected nobles are to be treated as regular dwarves, but mandates hold equal sway regarding justice

===Sitting on trees===
* Construct a wooden "tree" or several, spanning many (a dozen or so) z-levels
* Establish a successful fortress not inside, but around, these constructed trees

===Stop, Hey, What's that Sound===
* (Optionally) Generate a world with abundant cave systems
* Establish a fort near a very large cave
* Imitate the role of "Angband", leading small parties inside on military excursions
* No more than 3 dwarves can enter at a time
* Siege equipment and other weapons (or dangerous contraptions) that a dwarf can't carry on him is forbidden when cave-exploring

'''Variants'''
* Only solo adventurers are allowed to enter the dungeon
* Only use 'Thieves' to steal loot and create traps inside the dungeon

===The Mad Butcher===
(this requires a tiny amount of editing to the raws)
* Edit Dwarf Fortress\Raw\object\Creature_Domestic.txt and remove the tag [BUTCHERABLE_NONSTANDARD] from cats and dogs
* One dedicated Butcher+Tanner
* Minimal supplies and skills, so you can bring...
* As many puppies and kittens you can afford
* All food-gathering skills (except your Butcher+Tanner and Brewing) are forbidden

Caging your animals will increase performance to prepare a suitable butchery. Construct a wide, deep shaft to be zoned as an animal pit. At the bottom, outfit an isolation chamber complete with food and alcohol stockpiles, a bed, a butchery and a tanner's workshop. An active well will prevent mishaps. You should include during the construction either an airlock chamber (to enable the butcher to pass on food) or a second pit where the butcher dumps his created food. After construction, seal your butcher+tanner inside and live only off of his work.

===The World is Flat===
* No pre-embark requirements
* You'll probably want a region with lots of hills/mountains.
* You may only work/build/live on the original Z level where your wagon was
* No moats allowed, as this requires a channel, which goes below your z-level

==Arbitrary Law==
Rule your fortress with a Soapen Fist! Or see how far you get until a (voluntary) significant flaw sends you into an inevitable sadness spiral. Whatever it is, be sure to stick by it or you'll be meeting the Hammerer.

===ASPCA===
* [[Animals]] are forbidden from the fortress
* Animals following immigrants cannot enter the fortress
* Lethal traps forbidden, caged non-sentients must be immediately released
* Butchery is forbidden, but leatherworking is allowed

Rather than forbidding immigrant pets from entering, you can choose to deal with the owner of that pet instead for a more sadistic challenge.

===Commune===
* After embarking, enable all labors on all dwarves (including immigrants)
* Beds can only be designated as barracks, and no dwarf can be assigned to a bed (even nobles)
* Coins are forbidden
* Be aware that nobles are just "optional" and can't feel pain

===Couples only===
* As soon as a married couple exists in your fortress:
** Kill all single dwarves
** Kill all incoming single dwarves
** Try to save children, until they are adult and single

===Dieting Dwarves===
* Exclusively dine on a food type of your choice (meat, fish, plants, alcohol)
* Optionally, forbid alcohol consumption to limit carbohydrate intake
**Note: forbidding alcohol permanently is as good as accepting a slow but continuous fortress death

===Fight for your name===
* Before embarking, randomly generate a fortress name and be sure to know its English translation
* Do the same with your group name
* Creatively designate a serious goal for your fortress, based on these names
* Fanatically reach your goal

===Fort Geneva===
* Lethal traps are forbidden
* Caged sentient creatures are to be considered prisoners of war and treated humanely

Suggested provisions for prisoners: a bed, a personal cell, a commons area, aboveground exercise yard, and the clothes the creature was wearing when captured. For more inspiration, go to: [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Geneva_Conventions Geneva Conventions]

===Government in Exile===
* Only Military and Social skills can be purchased and enabled in your entire fortress

All dwarves are either nobles or in the military. The only useful dwarves you'll have will be your broker, manager, mayor, bookkeeper, and dungeon master. If you can survive until the sheriff arrives, transfer your entire military into the fortress guard. With a little luck, and a lot of exported roasts, you too can rule without proletarian interference.

===Hardcore Altruism===
* Do not allow the death of any Dwarf

Though not viscerally entertaining, an incredible challenge. All strange moods must be given what they crave. All medical attention must be done ASAP. Mining, fishing and hunting must be done with much care. Sadness must be met with excellent social skills and quality furniture.

===Industrial Plant===
* Choose one industry that produces commercial goods
* No other industries permitted, only imported

===Johannesfort===
* Find a starting location with a lot of gabbro, containing Kimberlite
* Mine and cut all the diamonds on the map
* Trade the gems for high-quality weapons and armor.

===Sexist Segregation===
* Establish two functioning and stable fortress
* One must be entirely male, the other entirely female
* Married couples are to be processed

===This. Is. SPARTAAAA!===
* At least half of your fortress population must be active in the military
* Crossbows and traps are forbidden
* Only spears, wrestling, and shields may be equipped by military and used to fight
* Civilian dwarves have all labors enabled
** If ever activated, cannot use quality weapons or armor
* Maimed dwarves (perceived to be) incapable of being fully healed must be killed
* Devise methods of dropping Liaisons down pits during meetings
* Demand goods be turned over from all caravans
* Recreation is forbidden, as well as any 'improving' action, such as smoothing/engraving, or constructing things out of metals what can be done with rock and wood (besides spears and shields)

Note that the above suggestions are modeled on the popular movie [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/300_(film) 300], which was historically inaccurate. For a more "realistic dwarven Sparta", try reading the wiki article on [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sparta#Society the real Sparta]

==Megaprojects==
Instead of deliberately inhibiting yourself, create a wonder of the dwarven world that would make the Mountainhomes proud. Be sure to upload it to the [[http://mkv25.net/dfma/ Dwarf Fortress Map Archive]] when it's finished. More projects can be found where [[Stupid_dwarf_trick|stupid dwarves try crazy tricks]]. [[Mega construction|Incredible feats of construction]] are usually very [[Fun|fun]] so you'll see many different (and probably similar) constructions across the Wiki. Use whatever ideas you think are ingenious.

===Aqueducts===
For some reason, a noble was harmlessly pulling a lever when suddenly, magma flooded the river and exploded the booze! The king requires your band of seven to build a great aqueduct to bring water to the capital. Start with supports, and build up your aqueduct until it is 10 z-levels high!

BONUS: Start over a human town, build a wall around it, pump water through the aqueduct and into it!

===Biodome===
All material, seeds, food, tools, and dwarves must be in the fortress within one year. Then, seal up the entrance. Any new immigrants... well, they might be in trouble. Survive for as long as possible!

No chasms/underground rivers/magma vents allowed.

===Casting===
Who needs to construct giant statues?! We need ours made from natural walls, however, we want it above ground level as well. For casting your goal is to create some giant structure out of natural obsidian walls through the use of an extremely elaborate scaffold of lava and water pools and screw pumps. When you are finished, just deconstruct the scaffolding and smooth/engrave the statue as you go. Just imagine the bridge over that chasm, now complete with two giant dwarf statues on either side to strike fear into all who enter and to show them the power of your fortress.

===Castle===
Build a castle, greater than anything built by human, elf or dwarf. This is highly time
consuming if you want it to be a good castle. There must be floor indoors, and no underground
constructions except for mining operations and cellars. For an even greater challenge, build
a gigantic tower in the middle, where the nobles stay.

===Ceremonial Sacrifices===
Build an amazingly complex or spectacular killing device. A shaft that extends across the entire Z-plane is a good start. A constantly shifting maze of atomsmasher drawbridges is another. For the minimalist, a very confined space where you will drop a dwarf wrestler along with the gobbos once in a while. Perhaps a waterslide that carries your prisoner all the way down into a chasm? Whatever your idea, build it and dedicate your fort to the construction, maintenance and improvement of your device.

Do not kill any of your invaders. Capture them using cage traps, and them set them off in your device. Keep a record of the number of victims you drop into it.

===Computing===
Can your dwarves build the [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Antikythera_mechanism Antikythera mechanism]? Can you program the fortress to play tic-tac-toe? More details at [[computing]].

===Colosseum===
Build a pit, around it on steps lots of Thrones, make the whole thing a meeting area, train Gladiators, capture goblins, leave them their weapons and let them fight against your gladiators. If they win, let them go.

===Crematory Fortress===
* Requires a [[magma pipe]] and [[bauxite]].

Build a temple structure above a [[magma pipe]] and [[engrave]] every available surface. The temple should be as opulent as possible. In the temple, build a retracting [[bridge]] over a hole in the floor, and designate a [[coffin]] [[stockpile]] on it. Whenever a dwarf dies, build a [[bauxite]] or other [[magma-proof]] [[coffin]] for him, place it on the [[bridge]], and retract it, committing his body to the [[magma|fiery blood of the mountain]].

::Note: At the time of writing, the editor isn't sure if coffins falling off the bottom of the map count as being 'lost.' If they do, channel out a magma pool and put the temple above that to avoid tantrums.

===Doomsday Clock===
Build a water or mechanical clock whose final state triggers the support which holds your fortress up or a megabeast out.
See how much wealth you can achieve before the clock runs out.
*Bonus: Create something that resets itself, as well as purging the map, so that you can reuse the same fortress over and over.
*Super-Bonus: Create something that involves pressure plates and a small kitten, when the pressure plates are hit in the right order, your map ends. Toss the kitten in and hope for the best.

===Dwarf like an Egyptian===
*Build a pyramid of epic proportion.

Build a legendary dwarven pyramid, with a corridor running to a central tomb for your favourite noble. Then construct lots of different [[traps]] in it to avoid grave robbery. Perhaps build it entirely out of glass? Or try to make the top twist in a bit of a swirl. Alternatively, make your entire fortress inside a pyramid, which stretches below the ground.

*Build rows of Obelisks

Build a double row of Obelisks before the Pyramid, and engrave the sides. Build ramps on the tops.

===Graveyard Master===
Every dwarf deserves a decent resting place:
*Build a tomb for ever dwarf that dies, the more dwarves you manage to bury the better.
*Tombs must be rooms with exactly 5x5 of size and 1 of height, with only one entrance tile that must be closed by a door.
*Tombs must have all its surfaces engraved.
*Tomb must contain at least 4 statues.
*Once complete, the door must be locked and the tomb must not be ever entered again.

===How high can you go?===
Construction, construction, construction! Just how big a tower can you build? Out of glass maybe, clear glass? Steel? Pump water to the top? Make your tower a ''pinnacle'' of achievement and stun humans, elves and goblins alike - for they know nothing of construction and engineering like dwarves do!

===Land battleship===
Turn your mountain into a huge battle-station, complete with crew quarters, decks, command centre, cantina, and a large collection of deadly weapons : Batteries of marksdwarves, ballista cannons, catapults, but also lava projector or remote explosive devices (ie cave-ins in a part of the map triggered by a lever). Make sure it ends up looking like a real battleship, with nothing but plains surrounding it (you could build it on an actual plain, or destroy a mountain, choice is yours). The battleship has to be autonomous, and dwarves shouldn't wander outside it.

*Bonus: The weaponry covers every tile of the map (i.e., everything that enters the map can be shot)
*Bonus: Build several other ships, maybe dedicated to a specific product (food, ammo etc.)
*Bonus: Each crew member has a civil and military formation, and when the enemy arrives, stop every economic activity. All hands to quarters !
*Mega Bonus: After building your Ship(s), flood the surrounding countryside.

===Moria===
Build a huge hall - at least 3 z-levels high. Leave few pillars symmetrically placed in the hall (don't build them, carve them out). Smooth and possibly engrave everything (not only the lowest z-level!). Then build thin bridge (not the bridge building, just a thin piece of rock to walk on) above magma - support it with bauxite supports connected to a lever (bauxite mechanisms needed in support). Destroy stone holding it at the both ends and replace it with floor hatches (so when you pull the lever it all goes down). After that build a bridge above the chasm.
When it's all done seal your dwarves deep inside in safe place and get invaded by goblins. At the same time dig out HFS. Lead the HFS across the both bridges and then collapse the second one when one of the champions clashes with it (it doesn't matter that the champion has killed the HFS with one hit).

===Mountain audit/core sample===
Start in a mountainous area and strip mine everything down, down, down to ground level. Stockpile everything, and calculate the mountain's composition. For kicks, try not excavating one tile on each z-level. You'll be left with one enormous core sample.

===Santa Claus===
Get ten thousand toys built and offered to caravans yearly. Optionally, build ten thousand toys, fetch them in adventure mode and deliver them to every single city of the world.

===Skull collector===
What proves the might of a civilization better than a hall full of skulls?
*Try to collect as many skulls as you can during your fortress life, and put then in a special skulls-only storage. The more skulls the better.

BONUS: Cover all the skulls in blood, and make the stockpile also a throne room.
SUPERBONUS: Also fill the throne room with kittens.

===Space Ship===
Create a giant space ship fit for space travel. It should be able to hold about 100 dwarves for at least 2 years.

BONUS: Use exploding [[booze]] as ignitable fuel.
BONUS: Make a removable [[ramp]] for boarding.
BONUS: Make the [[water]] for the 2 years be on the ship using removable pumps.
BONUS+: Make it totally self sufficient. (Make an internal system which pumps the [[water]] supply through a room every few years to muddy the floor. Plant [[seed|seeds]] in the [[mud]] that's now on the floor. Manage your consumption to maintain self sufficiency.)
BONUS+: Make it all out of [[steel]].
[[fun|FUN]]: Let it be held by a single [[support]], ignite the [[booze]], remove the support an let it "fly".
EVEN BETTER: Drop it down a chasm.

===Swiss Precision===
Build a working clock. The clock should accurately track DF days, months, and years.

Bonus Points:
*If the clock has a mechanical effect in the fortress proper to announce new days
*If the clock creates seasonally appropriate effects at the change of months and/or seasons.
*If the clock is used to aid in the operation of the fortress in addition to its role as a clock (automatically controls farmland irrigation at particular times, automatically opens the <s>blast doors</s> floodgates in time for merchants, etc...).
*If the clock governs the schedule of a working rail station (which is always on time). (Definitions of 'working' and 'rail station' are subject to player imagination).

But don't worry about the bonus points, a precision time device should be hard enough.

===Temple===
Designing a temple to Armok. Aesthetics count - the god will be very angry if there are no stained-glass windows and domed ceilings carved with frescoes. To gain more favor, make regular sacrifices and keep the fountains and rivers red with [[blood]].

===The cube===
Play a fort as usual, but emphasize catching goblins in cages to support and fill this construction:
Construct a series of rooms in a symmetrical fashion, all connected to each other with appropriate doors. Of course, enough rooms to make a maze-like structure, and if you feel like it, an exit that is hard to reach. Fill a bunch of the rooms with traps and pressureplates. Then fill one room with 4-6 goblins (preferably in cages, opened by an outside lever), release them and watch them randomly walk around the rooms dying to traps and whatnots.

*Bonus: Do multiple story maze (3d-maze)
*Bonus: Use pressureplates to open/close the exit randomly; otherwise, all the goblins will just follow the shortest route to the exit.

===The great brewery===
Disaster has struck the kingdom. A strangely glowing [[Fire|‼]]<nowiki></nowiki>peasant[[Fire|‼]] visited the greatest brewery of the empire, and as a result the whole thing exploded. No time for weeping — create its successor, a fort dedicated to alcohol production, and get the alcohol supplies flowing! Try to make the widest variety possible, and give or trade it to the dwarven [[caravan]] each year.

===The Great Wall of Urist===
Build a dwarven great wall of china that splits the map in half. Must be at least 10 tiles thick and reach the highest z-level.
* BONUS: Make it block the <s>mongols</s> goblins out of your half of the map.
* BONUS: Make it out of obsidian.
**BONUS+: Embark on a map without obsidian.
* BONUS: Find a way to make it touch the boundaries.
* BONUS: Build one gate
* BONUS: Arm it with ballistas.

===The Monolith===
As the inevitability of a fortress-wide mental breakdown looms over every single fortress why not have something that alludes to that precipice of [[insanity]]. Like the book and feature film, 2001: A Space Odyssey you must have a Monolith. This has to be made from [[obsidian]] and have a completely smooth surface (You cannot build it from blocks) You can have it be any size as long as it is outside, at least 2 tiles thick to ensure there are no pillar tiles, and has about the same ratio of width to height as it does in the movie (1:4:9) to make it as close to the real thing as possible. It would be preferable to make it large so that it seems to be dominating the landscape and your dwarves' psyche. The bigger the better.

*If the rock obsidian strata isn't deep enough in parts to make a monolith feasible consider casting a monolith with a large rectangular block in the exact same dimensional criteria as above.

===Underwater fortress===
Encase your entire fortress in [[water]]! Your fortress should be watersealed: surrounded by water against all [[wall]]s and the top of the fortress.
* Bonus: Build all water-touching walls/roof in clear glass!
* Bonus: Use [[magma]] instead of water!
* Bonus: Build it in the [[ocean]] or a non-freezing lake
* Bonus: Build large glass domes that encase the fortress. A dome 20 tiles wide should be 20 z-levels tall. Which may be hard to cover in water.
* Mod: Make your dwarves amphibious and include airlocks between the wet fortress and the dry.

===Wealth===
The kingdom's coffers need lining, so hop to! Found a fort and start accumulating wealth as fast as possible. Attain as high a fortress value as possible, and make most of your wealth into coins for the vault. Try to beat your record for one year, two years, or five years.

===World Domination===
Pretend you are an evil mastermind. Now come up with some device or machine to render the world (or at least your portion of the map) totally unlivable, aside from, of course, your hidden lair.

Suggestions:
* Flood the map with water/magma (may require building walls around the edge of the map)
* Build an "Earthquake Machine" (the entire map is supported by a single support, which is connected to a lever)
* Build an extensive holding cell network for "scientific purposes". Fill it with megabeasts and elephants in secret. Have a lever that lets everything free to feed on the general population.


[[Category:Guides]]