Editing Bloodline:Girdertrampled/Chapter 4:

Chapter 4<br>
From the Bloodline game [[ Bloodline:Girdertrampled | Girdertrampled]].<br>
The journal of Berengal Beardedbottom, containing entries throughout the year 1054.<br>
==1st Granite, 1054==
So the king sent me out to see what one of our newest additions to the kingdom was up to. Girdertrampled is the name, apparantly, although I've no idea what whomever thought of it must've been drinking when he did. I was just supposed to get a good look at the place, write my report, and return to the king, but apparantly the fortress was going so "well" that the previous boss decided to spend the rest of his days in a drunken stupor, oblivious to the outside world as much as possible. I took charge, as was only natural, and after I've gotten a good look at what's going on I can't say I blame him. There's a hydra roaming around the wilderness, so the fortress' bunkered up tight (they lowered the drawbridge just enough for me to get inside), goblins everywhere, or, at least, their remains. A part of the fortress looks accidentally flooded, because I sure as hell can't see a reason why there should be water there. I think I also see a well down there...

First things first. Put a bloody hatch on the gaping hole in the waterfall room. No, not the waterfall, the other one. There's mud all around it.
[[Image:BerGirdle1.PNG|center|F stands for "fucking"]]
==4th Granite, 1054==
Someone made a bracelet that's apparantly really awesome. Want a medal? Kill the hydra, and you can get a medal. I haven't even bothered to look at it.
[[Image:BerGirdle2.PNG|center|I've never been much into bracelets. I'm more a crowns kind of guy.]]

I've ordered the production of several mechanisms for use in cage traps. We'll get that hydra soon enough.
==8th Granite, 1054==
I've been here a week, and people are already dying. The lack of buckets lead to a slightly injured farmer thirsting to death. I've ordered the production of a hundered buckets to ensure this won't happen in the future.

==10th Granite, 1054==
Oh, this is ever so much fun!
[[Image:BerGirdle3.PNG|center|Did you know that lashes do the least damage in this game, and also make poor siege weapons in general?]]
I'm still waiting for someone to build my mechanisms so i can build some defenses. I also noticed that the workshops are spread all around, so I've ordered a site dug out just for workshops. It should streamline the productivity some.
==25th Granite, 1054==
The fortress ran out of wood about a week ago. Without wood, no barrels. Without barrels, no beer. Without beer, i get a bunch of angry dwarves, and no beer for myself either. Seeing the huge amount of logs stacked just outside my fortress gates, I ordered the gates opened and a few dwarves to go fetch. Unfortunately the hydra pounced us pretty quickly. Being the good tactician that I am, I ordered every dwarf not worth his salt to throw himself at it until it collapsed from exhaustion. It worked splendidly, and the hydra is now fouling up our corridors with it's peculiar smell of rotten rot. It also cleared up the undesireable population somewhat, and I'm happy to report that what could've turned into an unbecoming brawl for the last drops of booze has been averted, allowing our barrel production to pick up speed again.
==6th Slate, 1054==
The goblin siege has been turned away, thanks to our brave military. I'm happy to report that no lives were lost, as I ordered the goblins shot down from afar where their puny lashes couldn't reach. They started fleeing and I opened the fortress up for business again. The few goblins who didn't manage to escape fast enough were quickly hunted down by rabid woodcutters, who too long had been denied the pleasures of chopping things.
==9th Slate, 1054==
The recent victories in combat have opened my eyes to a new problem with out fortress: The lack of graves. I've told my minions to just dump whatever corpses they find outside until my latest orders are fulfilled: A grand tomb, and a bunch of coffins. It should be enough to last this fortress about two hundered years, assuming the multi-headed lizard population keeps low.
==28th Slate, 1054==
Great, a bunch of nobles just showed up. Well, I hope they're happy about sleeping in dirty run down rooms, because that's all we've got now, and I haven't got the time to make anything better. At least not to people who won't pay any rent, as an assistant just told me we have to start doing now. Something about a tax collector coming with them. The bunch of migrants that showed up with them were mostly no good. A hammerdwarf was welcomed into the military, but the rest of them were mostly just peasants and soap makers. All in all about 20 migrants, more than making up for what the hydra had for dinner.

==6th Felsite, 1054==
I've noticed that the entrance really stinks. There's blood, vomit and miasma everywhere, not to mention the corpses lying around. We need a proper garbage pit somewhere to store all the unneeded crap we find. I'll go look for one.
[[Image:BerGirdle4.PNG|center|WELCOME TO FUCKING BOATM... ...wait...]]
==18th Felsite, 1054==
These bunch of nitwits don't know how to do anything. Another dwarf just died from thirst, but with the bunch of buckets I ordered them that's not the problem. Instead they're too busy lugging things from one place to another, just to have someone else bring it back again. Something's seriously wrong with how these people think...
==1st Hematite, 1054==
An animal trainer just suddenly stopped working and hid himself in a workshop. He's probably going to make a wardog out of rock and goblin skulls.
==8th Hematite, 1054==
When will anyone make me an adamantine full plate mail out of air and wishes? Of all the wonderful and fantastic items that could've been forged, my dwarves only make useless stuff. It might be pretty, but I'm a pragmatist at heart.
[[Image:BerGirdle5.PNG|center|Now, I know I said I liked crowns, but I'm not too sure about the turtle bone. Can't I have, like, iron spikes on it instead?]]
==16th Hematite, 1054==
A human diplomat arrives. How fun. Also, merchants.
==22th Hematite, 1054==
No less than six goblins showed up, looking to run away with babies or wonderfully crafted earrings made of goblin fingers, all after the human caravan showed up. There's been bolts flying all over, and it doesn't seem to stop. Now the goblins decided to really give us what for and sent... three goblins at once. I'm so scared, especialy considering the human caravan guards sitting right outside my doorstep.
[[Image:BerGirdle6.PNG|center|There are more on the other z level]]
==26th Hematite, 1054==
One of our woodcutters is a bit of an artist. He likes to sketch the various animals and creatures he discovers while destroying their homes with an axe. On the next page you'll find one of his latest drawings. That of a dragon.
[[Image:BerGirdle7.PNG|center|My second dragon in this game. This one went down too easily.]]

==1st Malachite, 1054==
The dragon appears dead, although I cannot be too sure with all the smoke and fumes around. A premilinary casuality list follows: 1 Peasant (he thought the dragon might be friendly). 1 Donkey. 1 Human caravan. 1 Smashed trade depot. Lots of burning goods. Other than that, everything appears fine, except the very pillar of the community, the broker, town manager and grand treasurer is on fire. I suspect he won't be around to drink toddy with the rest of us come winter. The moat is also on fire, which I find awesome, appart from the smoke. If I get time, I'll see if I can find a way of setting it on fire permanently.
==7th Malachite, 1054==
We seem to be having a forest fire on our hands. What's funny is everything ''except'' the trees are on fire.
[[Image:BerGirdle8.PNG|center|I like to tell myself the trees are above grass fires. Get it? Above? I kill myself sometimes.]]
==13th Malachite, 1054==
Some dwarves finally took it upon themselves to dig out the worshop space I've ordered them to long ago. It's about halfway done, and I've already ordered the construction of several workshops. Hopefully this'll speed up production in the near future. On a separate note, I've noticed how the population, despite attacks by goblins, hydras and dragons, is on the increase. We're now at 81 dwarves, which is three more than the 78 that were here when I arrived. We're one less working dwarf though, because of four freeloading nobles that arrived.
==6th Galena, 1054==
Once the danger was over, I told my dwarves they could go outside again, but guess what the first thing they did was? Run right into the flaming inferno that was the trade depot, setting themselves on fire. About eight dwarves died almost at the same time before I told the idiots to stay inside again. This might prove to be a problem, as the fires could take some time to die out.
==1st Limestone, 1054==
The population's down to 58. I've managed to stop the humonguous wave of deaths by locking the outer doors. A few dwarves were trapped outside, but that's the price they pay for their stupidity. When I tell them that "outside is off-limits" they should be able to realize before going outside, leading to an endless cycle of "durrr, need to go outside to set myself on fire", "durrr, not allowed to be outside. Me go back in", "durr, need to go outside to set myself on fire." Honestly, the goblins are smarter than this. There's still the occational death happening, mostly due to divine intervention. Does not the book of Armok state that "thou shalt not covet thy neighbours burning trousers, for he who does shall surely perish in flames"? If only these dwarves were more reflected, much suffering could have been avoided. I've ordered hatches to be built so the outer hallway can be made completely inaccessible, but most dwarves are more interested in setting themselves on fire. I'm just waiting for the all out brawl to happen...
==14th Limestone, 1054==
You know, I'm starting to think someone has planned something special for we dwarves of Girdletrampled. Never before in my entire career as an overseer and personal assistant of the king have I encountered such hostility against... well, anything. Today one of the dwarves trapped on the outside of the fortress gave a shout. Goblins are invading again. It's early autumn, and thus far this year there's been two goblin sieges, a hydra, a dragon, a goblin ambush and about 20 goblin thieves and babysnatchers (that have been caught).
[[Image:BerGirdle9.PNG|center|There were three squads in total. A lasher squad and a bowman squad in addition to this one.]]
==26th Timber, 1054==
For the longest time I tried holding out, but eventually my dwarves could take it no more. I ordered the bridge lowered, military at the ready. Ever since the the siege started I've been telling people to put up traps, but they've been sort of mopey since I told them not to set fire to themselves, so there weren't many put up. However, as the goblins saw their opportunity and charged, a blessed wind caught hold of the still-burning remains of the trade-depot and restarted the fire that just a few months earlier had charred the entire land west of the brook. The grass had regrown enough that the fire caught, and soon the goblins were enveloped in fields of fire.
[[Image:BerGirdle10.PNG|center|Fields of burning goblins]][[Image:BerGirdle11.PNG|center|Hey, these images almost overlap perfectly]]
We praised the fire for a few minutes, then we returned to cursing it, as we had the last six months.
==2nd Opal, 1054==
We chased off the few remaining goblins easily enough, but not without a few casualties. One of them was a woodworker who got so excited once he got back into the forest that he fell asleep. Needless to say, the goblins standing just a couple of trees away promptly cut his head off with his own axe. Other than that, it's mostly back to normal. Dwarves are still burning to death at a sickening rate, only now the kittens have started doing it too. Strangely enough, the dogs don't. Other than the few we lost against the goblins, the dogs seem to do splendidly.
I'm beginning to think staying here was a mistake in the first place. Through absolutely no fault of my own this place has gone from somewhat shaky, but still working village to a charred wasteland, population 32 and a burning kitten. I've started composing my report and will return to the king as soon as I see an opportunity.
==31th Obsidian, 1054==
I'm out of here. A mason just went berserk and almost ripped two guards in half before being struck down by the hammerer himself. This place is cursed, I tell you, and I won't be a part of it. I've written my report, and I'm off to see the king. May whomever comes after me have much greater luck than I. Final headcount: 21, of which two are the half-dead guards, and I think one is the berserked mason, bleeding slowly to death. How many of the other dwarves are also injured I don't know, but there's probably a few. The floor hatches I ordered are finally installed, and I've told someone to close them and lock them after I leave. Unfortunately I see there's a few smoldering corpses inside the fortress proper as well now. The fire might be hard to contain, if possible at all.
:This is it. I'm off. I hope to never see this place again.
::Signed, Berengal Beardedbottom