Editing User:Shades

==ASCII Art Rewards==

===29 October 2007===

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  Fire seared the sky as the dragon circled, driven by madness and the
  promise of gold held deep within the dwarven tunnels.  Standing on the
  battlements of the stone façade built over the entrance to the
  fortress, Danrik the marksdwarf took aim at the evil target, his heart
  thumping slow and steady.  He waited two more beats and pulled the
  trigger.  An instant later a dozen marksdwarves let fly and a hail
  bolts pierced the smoky air.
  
  Most of the bolts bounced harmlessly away, but Danrik's well-aimed
  missile found the monsters skull, shattering the brain.  The dwarves
  cheered as the beast fell from the sky.  The smile fell from Danrik's
  face as the great corpse fell closer -- it was coming right at them!
  Dwarves climbed over each other, making for the stairs.  Other risked
  jumping from the wall, breaking their arms and legs as they landed.
  Danrik stood fast.
  
  As the dead dragon slammed into the fortress's stone wall the dwarves
  were flung into the air.  As Danrik flew, he damned the dragon with
  all his might, his foul words ripped away by the wind.  With a sudden
  crash, all went dark.

===24 July 2008===

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  "He's awoken," came the cry.  "He has awoken!"
  
  Pain came as Danrik opened his eyes.  A crowd of gaudily-dressed
  dwarves danced and sang in celebration of their hero.  It had been a
  week since Danrik had fallen.  His comrades slapped him on the
  shoulders.  One brought him a chalice of wine.  The dragon was dead.
  Every day since had been a celebration, but with the awakening of
  Danrik, the party had really begun.
  
  The mighty warrior made his way out of the bedroom, supported by two
  lusty dwarf women.  The masons were hard at work restoring the wall
  that the dead dragon had crashed through.  The dwarf led Danrik to the
  courtyard.
  
  "Speech!" cried the dwarves, "Speech!"
  
  "Oh," said Danrik, "Well…"
  
  A dark shape appeared in the gap between the walls, large and
  menacing.  The dwarves grew silent as it cast its glowing red eyes on
  the dwarf hero.
  
  "Yes," said the creature, "tell us how you slew the dragon, mighty
  dwarf, how you saved the day!"

===5 December 2009===

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  Dwarf hero Danrik called for his battleaxe.  A dwarven squire ran to
  him and put the weapon in his hand.  The dwarf held the weapon high,
  but collapsed, steadying himself on the hilt.  The demon laughed.  It
  had congealed into the form of a man wearing a dark cloak, horns upon
  his head, a nightmare lord of the underworld.
  
  “If this is the best you can you can do, you have clearly lost,” said
  the demon lord.  “You will bring me one maiden every season.”
  
  The nightmare lord looked over the cowering dwarves.  He pointed at
  the gasping form of Danrik.  “Start with that one’s sister.”
  
  Danrik watched helplessly as Andra, his lovely sister, was brought to
  the demon’s side.  The creature put its hand on her shoulder and the
  pair disappeared in a burst of blue flame.  Danrik howled with rage.
  A squire ran up to him and bowed his head.  “We will find Lady Andra,”
  said the boy.  “You can count on it.”
  
  “What is your name, youngster?” asked Danrik.
  
  “I am called Blackbeard,” said the boy.
  
  “A strong name for such a small body,” said the hero.  “You can begin
  the quest by fetching a dragon tooth from the ruins of the wall.  From
  it we will forge a mighty shank to drive into the heart of the demon
  lord.”
  
  The squire smiled and bounded away into the rubble.  It was the
  beginning of a hard recovery.  While the smiths worked in the forge to
  create the ultimate knife, Blackbeard trained the hero to walk again.
  When Danrik was able to put his fist through solid rock walls, they
  knew they were ready.  Danrik put the dragon dagger Gotter through his
  belt and stepped before the crowd.
  
  “I go now to rescue Lady Andra from the pit,” said Danrik.  “The road
  will be long and hard, to the fiery heart of the mountain and beyond,
  to the land of the dead.  Who is with me?”
  
  Blackbeard jumped up and down, raising his hand above the shoulders of
  those around him.  Though it looked grim, a few brave adventurers step
  forward.  It was not a question of whether they would reach the
  underworld, for they must reach it.  They must reach Andra, and slay
  her captors, for all great tales end this way.

===25 December 2010===

  kkk""",.@P@,P.,""kkk"k

  It is said that every great journey begins with a festival of
  drinking, but Danrik wasn’t in the mood.  All he could think of was
  that evil spirit with his sister and his soul burned with rage.  As
  the others celebrated their bravery, Danrik strolled up the trail
  toward Blood Mountain, kicking dirt clods as he went.
  
  “You weren’t thinking of leaving without me were you?”  It was Blackbeard.
  
  “Of course not,” said Danrik, placing a hand on the boy’s shoulder.
  “Let those fools drink themselves silly.  We have a fair maiden to
  save.”
  
  Together, the two adventuring dwarves mounted their ponies and trotted
  off into the darkness.  After a time the fires of the fortress
  disappeared behind the rolling wooded hills.  It was not long before
  they left the land of the dwarves and entered into the depths of
  Haunted Forest.  No one knew what kinds of wicked spirits dwelt there
  for few ever returned alive.
  
  “Why must we enter this dark place?” asked Blackbeard.
  
  “Blood Mountain lies on the other side of this forest,” said Danrik,
  “and nothing will stand between me and Andra.  We rest here.”
  
  “Here?” asked Blackbeard.  “Surely you could have picked a less creepy place.”
  
  It was true.  Danrik had picked a dreadful place to camp.  Everywhere
  the night birds, eyes of the enemy, were watching them.  The very
  trees seemed to reach out to grab them.  Worst of all, they had laid
  their camp on a kobold burrow.  Silently the creatures crawled from
  their holes, armed with bone knives, ready to cut the heart out of any
  poor fool.
  
  “Did you hear that?” said Blackbeard.


===05 February 2012===


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  Andra cried out as the grubby little goblin whipped her again.  She
  was locked in some sort of dungeon.  She couldn’t tell where for the
  strange rough-hewn black rock was unknown to her.  She pulled at her
  chains again.  One of them was loose.  Let me at that horned villain,
  thought Andra, but this one will die first.
  
  “Tell us, sister Andra,” said the goblin.  “Does it hurt?”
  
  The links of the chain exploded as the dwarf woman yanked with all her
  might.  The broken chain slapped the goblin upside the head, killing
  it instantly.  She undid her other hand and stole the goblin’s keys,
  escaping the dungeon, chain still attached.
  
  The view outside was terrifying.  Pillars of fire rose up from lakes
  of burning magma.  Andra found herself standing on the narrow ledge of
  a black pyramid at the center of the world.  It seemed that she could
  never escape this perfect prison.
  
  Pulling the chain tight, the solution was obvious.  She would find the
  horned king and force him to take her back.  Then she began to climb.
  The top was further than it looked.  It seemed she had been climbing
  for days, maybe for weeks.  Then she made the crest.
  
  The scene was ridiculous, for there was Danrik holding a shank to the
  demon lord’s belly while another dwarf was grappling him by the horns.
  
  “I swear,” whined the demon.  “I don’t know where she is!  She must
  have escaped!”
  
  “Danrik!” cried Andra.
  
  Danrik lost his concentration for a second and the demon slapped
  Gotter out of the dwarf hero’s hand.  Blackbeard nearly flew over the
  side of the pyramid as the demon bucked him off.  The creature ducked
  just in time to save its life as Andra whipped the chain over its
  head.
  
  “The knife!” cried Danrik.  “It’s the only way to kill it!”