Editing v0.31:Stupid dwarf trick

{{quality|Fine|13:08, 22 June 2010 (UTC)}}{{av}}

A '''stupid dwarf trick''' is any project that requires a large amount of time and effort - often for little or no practical benefit.  They exist only as a challenge for experienced players.  

Build a fortress specifically for exploring in [[adventure mode]]. You can either make a nasty monster-filled challenge, or a smörgåsbord of masterpiece adamantine weapons and armor. Possibly both. Breaching the [[caverns]] or [[hidden fun stuff]] should ensure the fortress is occupied.  

'''Usefulness:''' No direct usefulness in the fort where it's built, but Adamantine weapons and armor can be very useful in Adventurer Mode.  In theory, an adventurer can also leave items there which you can use in Dwarf Mode if you reclaim the fort, but in practice there is not really much worth the trouble.

Are your soldiers all sound asleep, while blood soaks the walls?  No need to deconstruct their beds one by one, ''if'' you bought the Dwarf Wakey 3000!  Simply a solitary floor tile balanced on a support, one or more can be toppled with the pull of a lever to produce an earth-shaking racket that'll have them leaping for their axes!

'''Usefulness:''' Limited. They will sleep through <s>'''anything'''</s> Noise. Although have been known to awaken when drenched in water, only waking up due to thinking it's alcohol, making an Alarm clock not impossible, if carefully prepared.

 

 

 

If your river's a long way away from your fortress, building a trans-map axle may be less efficient than building an aqueduct and pump stack driven by waterwheels in the river.  The pump stack raises it to the height of your fort, where it flows through the long, long aqueduct and drives waterwheels on the other end.  Getting the water pressure <em>just right</em> so it powers your waterwheel without flooding the fort can be [[Fun]].  Diagonal channels make good pressure reducers.  

==Aquifer Power==

Aquifers can be a resource of immense power.  If you have two levels of aquifer, you can generate a continuous flow by draining one level of aquifer into another and plant waterwheels above it.  One stream can power a lot of wheel.

'''Difficulty:''' High. Anything to do with draining aquifers is very [[Fun]].

 

'''Usefulness:''' High. The lowly windmill pales in utility compared to a waterwheel.

A Fortress in the Caverns, built by the first dwarf tribes. Build the Fortress however you see fit for those prehistoric Dwarves (i.e. only primitive metals, elaborate tombs for the chieftains with burial objects, cave art, etc.) and abandon it. Then, embark with modern Dwarves, and excavate the ancient Fortress. Sort of like the Adventure Fortress above, only for Reclaim Mode

'''Difficulty:''' As High as you want.

'''Usefulness:''' Not applicable.

*Bonus: A Museum detailing the lives of those early dwarves

To keep the waterfall going, you need a [[pump]] stack, preferably powered by a [[windmill]] or [[water wheel]]. Alternatively, an [[aquifer]], or other limitless water source, makes for a waterfall entirely underground.

'''Difficulty:''' Moderate (Low if there is an aquifer above pouring down).

'''Usefulness:''' Dwarves love [[waterfall]]s. Putting a waterfall in your [[meeting hall]] will give your dwarves good [[thought]]s, although it can significantly lower frame rate.

 

==[[Ballista]] Battery==

'''Usefulness:''' There are far more effective ways to defend a fortress, but few are as entertaining.

 

 

*Bonus: Excavate a reservoir and a lower river valley. <br />

*Bonus: Build a control center to control the water flow. <br />

*Bonus: Draw your entire energy from a power station within. <br />

 

 

 

'''Usefulness''': High.  Trains combat skills very quickly, assuming you don't kill anyone.

'''Downside''': Civilians and pets that wander into the danger room will inevitably get killed, even if you use low quality training spears.

*MegaDwarfBonus: Menacing spikes greatly increase the danger, and may help train your medical team (and/or your coffin construction crew).

*MegaDwarfBonus: Use [[adamantine]] spikes! On the plus side, you have a thriving coffin industry going now.

'''Difficulty:''' Low (burrows).  

Whenever a dog or cat gives birth, stuff all the kittens and puppies in one cage in your entryway.  Link this cage to a pressure plate beside it.  Should your last lines of defense be breached, goblins will step on it and in the next instant be torn apart by dozens of goblin-seeking hostiles and distracted by dozens of surplus targets.  The trap actually going off will probably be very bad for your frame rate.   

'''Usefulness:''' You can kill prisoners, useless peasants, irate nobles, hammerers, untamable animals, or anything else. Just be ready for something that knows how to swim.

 

 

 

==[[Computing|Dwarfputer]] Complex==

'''Usefulness:''' Your mechanics and architects will level up very fast.  Manual pumps give something for your haulers to do.  Try and make a clock to trigger different mechanisms in different seasons.  See if enemies actually blunder into your intricate traps.  Watch all hell break loose as water freezes.

Essentially, one of the many possible [[megaprojects]] dedicated to providing dwarves with rooms so high above the ground they get vertigo. Every floor must have plenty of rooms of at least 2x3 squares, with walls and a door surrounding this. Oh, and it has to go up as many Z-levels as possible. For extra credit, decide on what the top story will be (i.e. as many levels up as you deem possible, minus one so you can build a roof) and turn this into a Royal bedroom for a [[noble]], complete with gem windows, artifact/masterwork components, and untold numbers of armour stands and weapon racks. And then build some shorter but wider apartment buildings nearby to turn your fortress into essentially a giant fist with extended middle finger. Extra points for adding extra useless things for luxury, such as a magma-based heating system, fireplaces in rooms, and a lock-down lever in case of goblin attack. (or a self-destruct lever connected to the main supports, in case your dwarfish tenants are unsatisfied with your 5-star service.

'''Usefulness:''' Limited, because you could just dig the things underground and save yourself the hassle. However it is much harder to flood a tower than a cave, in case you're prone to fun by water. Additionally, if you have the time and resources to train a sizable force of marksdwarves, placing a few "security rooms" (with barracks, ammunition store, ration cache, armory, etc) at appropriate floors, complete with fortified balconies, will allow you to take advantage of the higher vantage point.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

*MegaDwarfBonus: Do some experimenting to invent the perfect daycare with the best possible results, then publish your findings on the forum or this page.

Why waste all those cut gems on things that only some selfish noble will enjoy? Create as large a wall-less sphere as you can, then cover it in Gem Windows of 3 different-colored gems to make it shine! The bigger, and more valuable gems involved (e.g., [[ruby|rubies]], [[sapphire]]s, and [[emerald]]s, or colored diamonds if you're really masochistic), the dwarfier.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

'''Usefulness:''' None except pretty colored barrels

*Bonus: Nether-caps are magma-resistant.  Flood your food stocks with magma to keep them safe from vermin and marauders.

A tall column of stairs plunging all the way down into the underdark, with a one-tile wide area of thin destructible floor all around it. In case of subterranean invasion, a thrown switch drops a stone O straight down, ringing the staircase and neatly severing all inter-level connections at a blow.  Does with one lever and one support what would take dozens of bridges or hundreds of retracting grates.

'''Difficulty:''' Harder than it sounds.

'''Usefulness:''' Sometimes...  sometimes they fly.

'''Usefulness:''' Will prevent any sieges, at least. Or anything else, save for the occasional invasion of sociopathic [[Carp]].

 

 

*MegaDwarfBonus: Use trained fish to kill off all creatures not of your colony.

Station some soldiers at the bottom of a shallow [[Activity_zone#Pit/Pond|pit]] and dump your captives in. You can also use dangerous animals instead of soldiers. For extra points, put the prisoners in cages connected to ramps underneath the arena floor.  One lever will open both the cage and a hatch above the ramp.  Variant: build prisoner cages inside the arena, link to a lever outside the arena, lock the soldiers in, and then open the cages.

'''Difficulty:''' Low, but time consuming. Some danger depending on the relative skill of your soldiers and the danger of the captive.  (If the prisoners have weapons, you can remove them by using {{k|d}}-{{k|b}}-{{k|d}} to dump the cage and its contents, then looking at and undumping the cages themselves with {{k|k}}-{{k|d}}).

'''Usefulness:''' Low to High, depending on how long your soldiers can draw out the execution. Equipping your soldiers with wooden training weapons can greatly increase the fun (and/or [[Fun]] if their armor isn't as good as you thought).

Sick of having your dwarves vomit all the time when they go out to retrieve loot or lumber? Despair no more! Build an almost-infinitely tall tower, and then put a glass floor on the highest level, spanning the entire map. For extra kicks, make a mechanism that will crash the entire thing upon the heads of the one goblin horde that manages to get through all your other deathtraps.

'''Difficulty:''' Medium. Very gruelling.

A [[farming|greenhouse]] is just a farm with the the ceiling channeled out from above. This lets you grow outdoor plants without venturing above ground. For maximum style, build the greenhouse above ground and cover it with a glass roof to keep your farmers safe.

'''Usefulness:''' Medium. Surface plants can be grown at any time of the year, and some are more useful than those available underground - for example, [[sun berry|sun berries]] can be brewed into valuable [[Sunshine]], and [[whip vine]]s can be milled into superior quality flour. Having greater food and booze diversity can also keep your dwarves happier.

*Bonus: Give it a glass floor to allow surface plants even lower down.

A gigantic hammer made out of pure steel and/or valuables looming over your fortress entrance ready to smite those foolish enough to lay a siege on you. Also gives you a psychological advantage over the traders who unload their goods under it. Attach to a lever-linked support for quick-smiting.

'''Difficulty:''' Low. Depends on size and materials, though. Make it a gold hammer menacing with adamantine spikes, if you're going for high quality.

'''Usefulness:''' Low-medium. 10x10 size is minimum for practical effectiveness. 30x30 attached to a handle extending from your entrance actually works against sieges.

*Bonus: Cover it with blood.

Building a huge tower is easy. To make things more [[fun]], make one out of some exotic material, like [[glass]], [[ice]], [[gold]], or [[soap]].  

'''Difficulty:''' Low. You need to be on a freezing map to pull off an ice tower.  

'''Usefulness:''' Depends entirely on you.

'''Usefulness:''' Negative. For some reason, no explorers have returned. Of course, if you select only the [[Nobles |Best and Brightest]] for the ship's crew...

 

A maze of twisty little passages, all alike. [[Trap]]s and dangerous animals are essential. You can have a retracting bridge drop invaders in, or just have a labyrinth as a back door.  

'''Usefulness:''' It makes a nice element of fortress defense, and you can dump your prisoners inside it. Also makes a great place to explore in [[adventure mode]].

*Bonus: Generate a world with large mountain [[cave]]s. Instead of using the labyrinth as your backdoor, use it as your fortress.

*MegaBonus: Make it three-dimensional and [http://gwydir.demon.co.uk/jo/maze/design/index.htm#uni unicursal].

'''Difficulty:''' Very high. You need [[metal]] (or [[glass]]) [[screw pump]]s to make it work, [[magma-safe]] floodgates and mechanisms, plus a big above-ground construction.  

This trick involves dripping water on to the middle of a magma pool until you have a column of obsidian, then channeling down into the obsidian ''more than'' one Z level, and putting a burial receptacle there.  This probably won't work in magma tubes or Volcanos since the created obsidian would fall into the bottomless pit.  The trick is getting the water to fall onto the magma in a controlled manner.   

 

==Mass Cage Recycling System==

 

Build a '''[[Mass pitting]]''' system to recycle your cage trap cages quickly.

'''Difficulty:''' Very easy. Requires basic digging and very little time.

'''Usefulness:''' Very. Keeps you from having to build cages before releasing monsters from them. With six hatches you can safely empty out 48 cages very quickly. You can build lots of cage traps without having to worry about emptying each cage individually.

*Bonus: Cover the floor of your pit with cage traps, creating a neverending cycle and giving your dwarves something to do during the long harsh summer when going outside is overly taxing on their stomachs.

'''Usefulness:''' Medium. Depends on the size of your fortress/defences/amount of attackers. Works well with fire creatures to create a sauna.

*Bonus: Make the statue hollow and have dwarves live inside it.

'''Usefulness:''' You can use this trick to create a waterfall or drowning chamber. It is also important if you want to pass through an [[Aquifer]], although that is far more difficult. The same trick can be used in lieu of a drawbridge, although its practicality as compared to the drawbridge is highly questionable.

==[[Obsidian]] factory==

'''Usefulness:''' Obsidian is 50% more valuable than [[flux]] and 3 times as valuable as ordinary stone, making it ideal for your [[mason]]s and [[stone crafter]]s. Done properly, it can also serve as a magma chamber ''and'' a drowning chamber.

Combine with an Execution Tower for maximum z-level executions! Traps which menace with spikes are a must.

*Bonus: Fill it with Magma instead (though Magma doesn't pressurize).

'''Difficulty:''' Low-mid, depending on the rarity of crystal glass.

*Bonus: Spike a goblin on every trap!

==Sectorized World==

Divide the world edges into multiple sectors and then gate access to each one separately. This allows you to protect your fortress from seiges whilst keeping access to most of the outside world and allowing most traders into and out of the fortress (those unfortunate enough to enter the world from the same direction as the seigers may be screwed, of course). For bonus points, build separate gateable access routes for each sector. For further bonus points, design your fortress so that you can simultaneously allow access to traders ''at the same time'' as seigers are exposed to your defensive mechanisms.

'''Difficulty:''' Low, unless you allow separate access routes for each sector in which case high.  

'''Usefulness:''' Moderate, increasing with each bonus you fill. Mostly for those who want to build the best possible defenses. Can also double as a means of easily trapping wild animals.

==Self Destruct Lever==

A mechanism that, for example, could flood your fort with magma, or release a trapped megabeast. For bonus points, build the whole fort on a single [[support]].  

'''Difficulty:''' Very high. Extremely fun.  

'''Usefulness:''' Could serve as kind of a last revenge on a goblin siege, but also highly amusing. If done properly it can make reclaim easier.

==[[Swimming]] pool==

It's a reservoir that fills to 4/7 exactly. Station soldiers inside, lock them in, and fill. This way they gain [[swimming]] skill.  

'''Difficulty:''' Low. It's just a pair of reservoirs.  

'''Usefulness:''' The swimming skill is only slightly useful. This is most useful if the entrance to your fort has narrow walkways/moats surrounded by water, and you station your soldiers there.  It does help gain attributes though. Though if you utilize a '''H'''ydraulic '''E'''levation and '''L'''owering '''P'''latform, this is a priceless necessity.

==Underground Forest==

Break into an underground cavern, make some muddy floors over a big area and wait.

'''Difficulty:''' Medium - need to dig out a suitably large area, then find a way of introducing water to the area and subsequently draining or evaporating it.

'''Usefulness:''' Depends on size (bigger is better) as well as proximity to wood stockpiles. A tree farm outside the caverns can grow trees from all 3 layers, and you'll never have to worry about hostile creatures threatening your wood cutters.

'''Difficulty:''' High.  Maintaining the correct water level is annoying difficult at times. Note: Incredibly easy with an aquifer.

'''Difficulty:''' Low.  

You can make the lodging room suited for the particular dwarf by adding furniture made from their favorite materials, and smoothing and engraving everything. Use quantum stockpiling to give them 10+ years of food and drink. Make sure the A.I. is unable to communicate with other dwarves. His/her mood must not be affected by the deaths of the walking meat-bags who tried to befriend him/her.

 

 

Alternately, you may use a vampire dwarf, which saves the need for an alarm (as they do not sleep), as well as the food stockpile.

<li>U.R.I.S.T. - '''U'''nderground '''R'''easonably '''I'''ntelligent '''S'''ettlement '''T'''echnologist</li>

<li>H.A.L. - '''H'''airy '''A'''lternate '''L'''ifeform</li>

<li>N.O.B.L.E. - '''N'''arcissistic '''O'''bnoxious '''B'''oastful '''L'''aughable '''E'''xcrement </li>

<li>M.A.G.M.A. - '''M'''assively '''A'''lcoholic '''G'''ear-'''M'''achine '''A'''ssembly</li>

<li>A.R.M.O.K. - '''A'''ll-'''R'''eaching '''M'''achine '''O'''f '''K'''illing</li>

<li>A.S.S. - '''A'''lmost-autonomous '''S'''ystems '''S'''elector</li>

<li>D.I.E.D. - '''D'''edicated '''I'''rrigation and '''E'''verything else '''D'''warf(s)</li>

Prevents [[cave adaptation]]. It's like the greenhouse, only instead of a farm, it's a [[meeting hall]] or [[barracks]]. Since you can't build [[table]]s or [[bed]]s outside, build the room and [[channel]] down to it.  Variant: above-ground statue garden or zoo.

'''Usefulness:''' Low. Make sure to wall the pit in or it will become very [[Fun]] once [[goblin]] archers become involved.

'''Difficulty:''' Medium. Moderate possibility of Fun by way of flooding your fortress. Any dwarves that can't swim will instead experience Fun when using the Watervator. The actual construction time and resource usage is very low. Using the Watervator often leads to unhappy thoughts about drowning

'''Usefulness:''' Low to Medium. The Watervator requires manual micromanaging, while stairs do not. On the other hand, it can be used to create a pathway that most <s>Dwarves</s> enemies will simply be unable to use. Those that can would still be doing so at great risk of drowning or falling to their death. It is recommend that with the exception of the entrance you use stairs.