User talk:DJMuffinMan

Hi All, I'm DJMuffinMan. I'm a man of few words, and I really like DF.

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As my first notable ridiculous DF story, I'd like to tell you about my latest Strange Mood Artifact: Kivish Helmsshanks, a Pig tail skirt. This is a Pig tail skirt. All craftsdwarfship is of the highest quality. It is encrusted with Melanite, decorated with Pig Tail and Alder and encircled with bands of Pig tail and Maple. It is made from Pig tail cloth. This object is adorned with hanging rings of Birch and Mica and menaces with spikes of Tin and Highwood.

And just when I thought DF couldn't get more ridiculous. I mean, how could one even SIT DOWN with that thing on?? It's 19 dwarf-weight thingies heavy, and is valued at 34000 Star-Money-Things.

19Γ is pretty light and 34000☼ is pretty cheap (in artifact terms anyway), but it's a pig tail skirt - what do you expect? :P
And maybe it's a female's skirt with the spikes on the inside, if you know what I mean. --GreyMaria 00:19, 12 December 2008 (EST)

Mmmm, yes...Indeed. Fufufu.

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Ha, here's another funny one: Vathezniral "The Virginal Portents", a common skate leather shield. This is a common skate leather shield. All craftsdwarfship is of the highest quality. It is encrusted with Demantoid, decorated with common skate leather and encircled with bands of green glass. This object menaces with spikes of Gold and Cinnamon glossular. On the item is an image of a blazing sun in longnose gar leather. On the item is an image of prickle berries in Orthoclase. On the intem is an image of a Ash [mmm, delicious dwarven grammar, it are goodness] in turtle shell. On the item is an image of The Virginal Portents the common skate leather shield in anchovy bone.

Har har, this guy dwarf put a picture of his shield on his shield. I guess that means there is a picture of the shield on the shield on the shield on the shield on the shield on the... Wow. And the glass and gems and gold...If someone went into battle with this against me, I'm not sure whether I would succumb to the blinding of the sun off that shield or the sheer depression of being completely and utterly out-Blinged. Weighs 95Γ and costs 114600☼ [Not bad, I would say.]

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