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Difference between revisions of "User:Shades"
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(Update to ascii art rewards (delayed six months as it turns out I'm lazy)) |
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“Did you hear that?” said Blackbeard. | “Did you hear that?” said Blackbeard. | ||
+ | |||
+ | |||
+ | ===05 February 2012==== | ||
+ | |||
+ | |||
+ | ~@//////+@/&@+\\\\\\\ | ||
+ | |||
+ | Andra cried out as the grubby little goblin whipped her again. She | ||
+ | was locked in some sort of dungeon. She couldn’t tell where for the | ||
+ | strange rough-hewn black rock was unknown to her. She pulled at her | ||
+ | chains again. One of them was loose. Let me at that horned villain, | ||
+ | thought Andra, but this one will die first. | ||
+ | |||
+ | “Tell us, sister Andra,” said the goblin. “Does it hurt?” | ||
+ | |||
+ | The links of the chain exploded as the dwarf woman yanked with all her | ||
+ | might. The broken chain slapped the goblin upside the head, killing | ||
+ | it instantly. She undid her other hand and stole the goblin’s keys, | ||
+ | escaping the dungeon, chain still attached. | ||
+ | |||
+ | The view outside was terrifying. Pillars of fire rose up from lakes | ||
+ | of burning magma. Andra found herself standing on the narrow ledge of | ||
+ | a black pyramid at the center of the world. It seemed that she could | ||
+ | never escape this perfect prison. | ||
+ | |||
+ | Pulling the chain tight, the solution was obvious. She would find the | ||
+ | horned king and force him to take her back. Then she began to climb. | ||
+ | The top was further than it looked. It seemed she had been climbing | ||
+ | for days, maybe for weeks. Then she made the crest. | ||
+ | |||
+ | The scene was ridiculous, for there was Danrik holding a shank to the | ||
+ | demon lord’s belly while another dwarf was grappling him by the horns. | ||
+ | |||
+ | “I swear,” whined the demon. “I don’t know where she is! She must | ||
+ | have escaped!” | ||
+ | |||
+ | “Danrik!” cried Andra. | ||
+ | |||
+ | Danrik lost his concentration for a second and the demon slapped | ||
+ | Gotter out of the dwarf hero’s hand. Blackbeard nearly flew over the | ||
+ | side of the pyramid as the demon bucked him off. The creature ducked | ||
+ | just in time to save its life as Andra whipped the chain over its | ||
+ | head. | ||
+ | |||
+ | “The knife!” cried Danrik. “It’s the only way to kill it!” |
Revision as of 09:39, 30 January 2014
ASCII Art Rewards
29 October 2007
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Fire seared the sky as the dragon circled, driven by madness and the promise of gold held deep within the dwarven tunnels. Standing on the battlements of the stone façade built over the entrance to the fortress, Danrik the marksdwarf took aim at the evil target, his heart thumping slow and steady. He waited two more beats and pulled the trigger. An instant later a dozen marksdwarves let fly and a hail bolts pierced the smoky air. Most of the bolts bounced harmlessly away, but Danrik's well-aimed missile found the monsters skull, shattering the brain. The dwarves cheered as the beast fell from the sky. The smile fell from Danrik's face as the great corpse fell closer -- it was coming right at them! Dwarves climbed over each other, making for the stairs. Other risked jumping from the wall, breaking their arms and legs as they landed. Danrik stood fast. As the dead dragon slammed into the fortress's stone wall the dwarves were flung into the air. As Danrik flew, he damned the dragon with all his might, his foul words ripped away by the wind. With a sudden crash, all went dark.
24 July 2008
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"He's awoken," came the cry. "He has awoken!" Pain came as Danrik opened his eyes. A crowd of gaudily-dressed dwarves danced and sang in celebration of their hero. It had been a week since Danrik had fallen. His comrades slapped him on the shoulders. One brought him a chalice of wine. The dragon was dead. Every day since had been a celebration, but with the awakening of Danrik, the party had really begun. The mighty warrior made his way out of the bedroom, supported by two lusty dwarf women. The masons were hard at work restoring the wall that the dead dragon had crashed through. The dwarf led Danrik to the courtyard. "Speech!" cried the dwarves, "Speech!" "Oh," said Danrik, "Well…" A dark shape appeared in the gap between the walls, large and menacing. The dwarves grew silent as it cast its glowing red eyes on the dwarf hero. "Yes," said the creature, "tell us how you slew the dragon, mighty dwarf, how you saved the day!"
5 December 2009
+@/+@@@+@@@@@@@
Dwarf hero Danrik called for his battleaxe. A dwarven squire ran to him and put the weapon in his hand. The dwarf held the weapon high, but collapsed, steadying himself on the hilt. The demon laughed. It had congealed into the form of a man wearing a dark cloak, horns upon his head, a nightmare lord of the underworld. “If this is the best you can you can do, you have clearly lost,” said the demon lord. “You will bring me one maiden every season.” The nightmare lord looked over the cowering dwarves. He pointed at the gasping form of Danrik. “Start with that one’s sister.” Danrik watched helplessly as Andra, his lovely sister, was brought to the demon’s side. The creature put its hand on her shoulder and the pair disappeared in a burst of blue flame. Danrik howled with rage. A squire ran up to him and bowed his head. “We will find Lady Andra,” said the boy. “You can count on it.” “What is your name, youngster?” asked Danrik. “I am called Blackbeard,” said the boy. “A strong name for such a small body,” said the hero. “You can begin the quest by fetching a dragon tooth from the ruins of the wall. From it we will forge a mighty shank to drive into the heart of the demon lord.” The squire smiled and bounded away into the rubble. It was the beginning of a hard recovery. While the smiths worked in the forge to create the ultimate knife, Blackbeard trained the hero to walk again. When Danrik was able to put his fist through solid rock walls, they knew they were ready. Danrik put the dragon dagger Gotter through his belt and stepped before the crowd. “I go now to rescue Lady Andra from the pit,” said Danrik. “The road will be long and hard, to the fiery heart of the mountain and beyond, to the land of the dead. Who is with me?” Blackbeard jumped up and down, raising his hand above the shoulders of those around him. Though it looked grim, a few brave adventurers step forward. It was not a question of whether they would reach the underworld, for they must reach it. They must reach Andra, and slay her captors, for all great tales end this way.
25 December 2010
kkk""",.@P@,P.,""kkk"k
It is said that every great journey begins with a festival of drinking, but Danrik wasn’t in the mood. All he could think of was that evil spirit with his sister and his soul burned with rage. As the others celebrated their bravery, Danrik strolled up the trail toward Blood Mountain, kicking dirt clods as he went. “You weren’t thinking of leaving without me were you?” It was Blackbeard. “Of course not,” said Danrik, placing a hand on the boy’s shoulder. “Let those fools drink themselves silly. We have a fair maiden to save.” Together, the two adventuring dwarves mounted their ponies and trotted off into the darkness. After a time the fires of the fortress disappeared behind the rolling wooded hills. It was not long before they left the land of the dwarves and entered into the depths of Haunted Forest. No one knew what kinds of wicked spirits dwelt there for few ever returned alive. “Why must we enter this dark place?” asked Blackbeard. “Blood Mountain lies on the other side of this forest,” said Danrik, “and nothing will stand between me and Andra. We rest here.” “Here?” asked Blackbeard. “Surely you could have picked a less creepy place.” It was true. Danrik had picked a dreadful place to camp. Everywhere the night birds, eyes of the enemy, were watching them. The very trees seemed to reach out to grab them. Worst of all, they had laid their camp on a kobold burrow. Silently the creatures crawled from their holes, armed with bone knives, ready to cut the heart out of any poor fool. “Did you hear that?” said Blackbeard.
05 February 2012=
~@//////+@/&@+\\\\\\\
Andra cried out as the grubby little goblin whipped her again. She was locked in some sort of dungeon. She couldn’t tell where for the strange rough-hewn black rock was unknown to her. She pulled at her chains again. One of them was loose. Let me at that horned villain, thought Andra, but this one will die first. “Tell us, sister Andra,” said the goblin. “Does it hurt?” The links of the chain exploded as the dwarf woman yanked with all her might. The broken chain slapped the goblin upside the head, killing it instantly. She undid her other hand and stole the goblin’s keys, escaping the dungeon, chain still attached. The view outside was terrifying. Pillars of fire rose up from lakes of burning magma. Andra found herself standing on the narrow ledge of a black pyramid at the center of the world. It seemed that she could never escape this perfect prison. Pulling the chain tight, the solution was obvious. She would find the horned king and force him to take her back. Then she began to climb. The top was further than it looked. It seemed she had been climbing for days, maybe for weeks. Then she made the crest. The scene was ridiculous, for there was Danrik holding a shank to the demon lord’s belly while another dwarf was grappling him by the horns. “I swear,” whined the demon. “I don’t know where she is! She must have escaped!” “Danrik!” cried Andra. Danrik lost his concentration for a second and the demon slapped Gotter out of the dwarf hero’s hand. Blackbeard nearly flew over the side of the pyramid as the demon bucked him off. The creature ducked just in time to save its life as Andra whipped the chain over its head. “The knife!” cried Danrik. “It’s the only way to kill it!”