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Editing User:EricBlank
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Just so I have some text on this page, I'm going to explain the current state and history of my only remaining playable fort. The others are missing something I modded in and can't remember where it went or it's tags/attributes so I really can't do anything about that. | Just so I have some text on this page, I'm going to explain the current state and history of my only remaining playable fort. The others are missing something I modded in and can't remember where it went or it's tags/attributes so I really can't do anything about that. | ||
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Love-armors was founded in 80, by the group called The Gloves of Strapping, of the civilization known as The True Bust, on the plane of Amethaecamo. | Love-armors was founded in 80, by the group called The Gloves of Strapping, of the civilization known as The True Bust, on the plane of Amethaecamo. | ||
− | + | If there wasn't enough references to sex in that, then it will help you to know that I gave every living creature in the game genitals, including | |
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gender-specific ones for gender-specific species, anuses and rectums, bladders and urethras. It makes their deaths even more hilarious when they | gender-specific ones for gender-specific species, anuses and rectums, bladders and urethras. It makes their deaths even more hilarious when they | ||
bleed to death out their assholes after falling into the river and being eaten alive by carp, sea lampreys, longnose gar, or pike. On another note, | bleed to death out their assholes after falling into the river and being eaten alive by carp, sea lampreys, longnose gar, or pike. On another note, | ||
no carp has of yet been named for it's blitzkrieg of death, nor has any begun one, while the other three species all have at least one named member, one | no carp has of yet been named for it's blitzkrieg of death, nor has any begun one, while the other three species all have at least one named member, one | ||
of which is still alive. | of which is still alive. | ||
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The fortress itself is built into the northeast bank of a river fork, a massive 20-30 wide river flowing down the west side and a small 4-wide | The fortress itself is built into the northeast bank of a river fork, a massive 20-30 wide river flowing down the west side and a small 4-wide | ||
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next to the fort. | next to the fort. | ||
+ | I plan to use this as a happiness booster in the future but that is currently not plausible.</nowiki> | ||
In the first year, 80, I suddenly realized that my civilization didn't even HAVE battle axes or hatchets to send with us, which meant we | In the first year, 80, I suddenly realized that my civilization didn't even HAVE battle axes or hatchets to send with us, which meant we | ||
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homes. There is also a temple that will soon be fully decorated, and already has coffins for the entire current population, of 40, with around | homes. There is also a temple that will soon be fully decorated, and already has coffins for the entire current population, of 40, with around | ||
60 more dead... | 60 more dead... | ||
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Since the first year, the fort has been besieged non-stop by orcish warriors and goblin raids, with the occaisional raccoon or monkey. They | Since the first year, the fort has been besieged non-stop by orcish warriors and goblin raids, with the occaisional raccoon or monkey. They | ||
− | always arrive in tune with the caravans, and wreak havok, such as slaughtering an entire leptol (my own | + | always arrive in tune with the caravans, and wreak havok, such as slaughtering an entire leptol (my own invention) caravan, which led to my |
− | retarded dwarves trudging north along the river to the site, and 6 of them, including 2 blacksmiths, 2 craftsman, a wrestler, and her baby | + | retarded dwarves trudging north along the river to the site, and 6 of them, including 2 blacksmiths, 2 craftsman, a wrestler, and her baby. The |
− | baby was actually torn from her mothers hands (or tossed in) by | + | baby was actually torn from her mothers hands (or tossed in) by a longnose gar, and eaten alive while her mother stood there, doing nothing, not |
even getting bad thoughts until it was actually dead. Then she jumped in and was also eaten alive. The fish was finally put down by a pair of | even getting bad thoughts until it was actually dead. Then she jumped in and was also eaten alive. The fish was finally put down by a pair of | ||
marksmen. | marksmen. | ||
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bridges. The third mayor ended his term normally, except that he was in bed the entire time, but was then killed while resting his leg, during | bridges. The third mayor ended his term normally, except that he was in bed the entire time, but was then killed while resting his leg, during | ||
another fateful goblin raid, which took 3 other lives. The current mayor has done nothing particularly interesting, nothing good, nothing bad. | another fateful goblin raid, which took 3 other lives. The current mayor has done nothing particularly interesting, nothing good, nothing bad. | ||
− | He's really just been idling, even when he is requested at the trade depot. I will have his name changed to Jimmy Carter | + | He's really just been idling, even when he is requested at the trade depot. I will have his name changed to Jimmy Carter. The position of Sheriff |
has been changed only once, after the original, Assy, who was a bit of a murderer herself, was killed in... a goblin raid... I really detest | has been changed only once, after the original, Assy, who was a bit of a murderer herself, was killed in... a goblin raid... I really detest | ||
− | goblins | + | goblins, but fortunately their raids have been kept at bay thanks to the introduction of rows of cage traps at both the bridges and guards at |
− | every entrance. We've so far caught | + | every entrance. We've so far caught 13 of the bottom-feeders, a black bear, and a pheasant. |
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− | + | I have planned for the construction of an arena to deal with them, unless toady plans to implement some way to rehabilitate hostiles into | |
+ | functioning members of society. | ||
− | + | In other news, the road that will allow passage of the trade wagons has been started on, and should be complete, even if never used, in a few | |
+ | years. | ||
+ | The current year is 84. |