Editing 23a:Department of Dwarven Veteran's Affairs

{{quality|Exceptional|18:57, 18 August 2014 (UTC)}}{{av}}
{{D for Dwarf}}

{{Noble
| noble=Fortress/Royal Guard
| arrival=
* [[Siege|Goblins]]
* [[Elf|The Green Party]]
* [[Unfortunate_accident|Accidents]]
| function=
* Assist the [[Sheriff]]
* Dupe [[noble]]s into thinking they safe here and not 2" away from dying
* Killing [[Goblin|Child snatchers]]
* Living off the government
* Sparring practice
* Retirement for mangled champions, to stop death-by-tantrum
}}

The '''Department of Dwarven Veteran's Affairs''' (also known as the '''Fortress/Royal Guard'''), is an organisation dedicated to helping those brave [[dwarf|dwarves]] that have become injured to the point of combat ineffectiveness, and are also relatively unskilled (so putting them into the [[Craftsdwarf's workshop]] to make +goblin bone [[bolt]]s+ until the end of time is out of the question).  They are usually <s>relieved of</s> promoted up from their military duties due to some [[Baron|snooty noble]] turning up and wanting to be all protected (until, of course, said [[noble]] makes one-too-many demands and find themselves in the [[Chasm|dwarven departure lounge]]).

These dwarves who have sustained their injuries in whatever way, whether through physical combat, [[Cave-in|creative excavation]], sparring matches, [[goblin]] snipers, [[Elves|hippies]], [[elephant|wildlife]], or otherwise, may be promoted through the military menu.

The fortress guard itself doesn't do much, apart from telling the various nobles that they are not in danger of [[Goblin|assassination]], assisting the [[Sheriff]] (now [[Captain of the guard|Captain of the Guard]]) in [[Justice|abusing citizens' rights]], and spending all their spare time [[Military#Training / Sparring|brawling]].  The sparring can be a problem, in that some dwarf who may have otherwise made a speedy recovery (you know the ones) manages to train himself up to an elite level, which prohibits his removal from the payrolls of DDVA.  Thus, active dwarves that can spend their time better [[Hauling|pulling levers]] are now only assisting with some engraver who is too busy smashing something other than a [[bridge]] over a [[chasm]].

The Royal guard similarly has few real responsibilities - while their function is to assure the [[tax collector]] that the citizens won't lynch him (and also claim some "taxes" for themselves in the process), they spend most of their time sparring with the Fortress guards.

==See also==
* [[Fortress guard]]
* [[Royal guard]]

{{Category|Nobles}}