Main Page/Quote

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{{#switch:89| |1=I can't put my finger on it. Something about this ‼Cat tallow roast‼ tastes funny. |2=Toady withdraws from society. Toady has begun a mysterious construction! |3=Let us never forget the last words of Inod the Stoker, "Aaah! Gorillas!" |4=Newborn Zuglar Baldnessgranite prefers to consume Gorilla. A sure sign of his unparalleled strength! |5=In an unrelated article - I had no idea elephants could bounce that high! |6=Toady looses a roaring laughter, fell and terrible! Toady has butchered a spammer! |7=The critical question is this: do elf bones yield more crossbow bolts than the average number of bolts necessary to kill an elf? |8="Dwarf Fortress" ... "Like chess, only with short people that can catch on fire like rags soaked in tar, and lots of booze." ... "Like chess." |9=Dwarf Fortress has taught me that all the world's problems would be substantially reduced had our parent civilizations never minted more than four stacks of coins. |10=Booze does all the work in forts. Dwarves are just booze exoskeletons. |11=My unconscious and bleeding mayor just mandated the construction of some goods. |12=I can just imagine a wagon throwing a tantrum and tossing all its contents at people. |13=Döbesh Udosdeb has been ecstatic lately. He was forced to eat a friend to survive. He enjoyed a truly decadent meal. |14=Iron screw pump exercise equipment. Pump iron and get superdwarvenly strong! |15=The violence, aggression, pain, madness, sadness of the ASCII characters never ceases to amaze me... |16=Wait, you're MAKING animals?
—Torak
At this moment, yes, I am smelting cows.
—Spiders Everywhere |17="Didn't you read the manual? He he he he... the manual... ..."
--Toady One |18=(Compared to real-world years) Dwarven years are shorter.
--Sowelu

Very fitting to dwarves, I must add.
--Sean Mirrsen |19=Magma is not a water source. Dwarves can't drink it or supply it to their wounded.
--AlienChickenPie |20="[B]oats are the enemy of tiles. And tiles are the enemy of boats."
--Toady One |21="I went through and fixed a few places where forbidden/on fire weren't being respected for next time. Burning milkable creatures were still a problem for example."
--Toady One |22="You have been processed! Go forth, now, and edit!"
--Savok |23="What happened in 1048?" "Jreengus occurred." |24=Making rock instruments isn't nearly as awesome as it sounds --Shandrunn |25=The cyclops I was quested to kill had a thousand year history of badassery, and all of that without the leg it lost in the Year 3 (a dwarf bit it off... I should probably deal with that). --Toady One |26=[FIREIMMUNE] makes them think that magma is safe but doesn't actually make them fireproof. This can lead to some rather interesting results. |27=Endok Cerolneth has begun a mysterious construction! Endok Cerolneth, Planter has given birth to a girl. |28="Incendia sunt socia vestra, armaque vestra, fortesque Montis Domi." "Magma is your ally, your weapon, the strength of the Mountain-Home." --Eita |29="Stopped people from giving quests to kill themselves." --Toady One |30="...And I simply doubt we have a need for 7 fishery workers. On top of that, a second soap maker. The hell IS soap?!" --Zero |31="This is a terrible pun. All craftsdwarfship is of the poorest quality." - Soup_alex |32="The default mental state of a dwarf is madness. Sanity is a temporary condition - a PRIVILEGE you have to EARN!" --Fedor |33="Why get normal cats? I buy lolcats in the embark screen. Much more fun to engrave about them." --Yanlin |34="Dwarf Fortress taught me it was okay to make a suit out of my neighbour's skin, as long as I gave it a name." |35="Got rid of world gen crash during succession after death of prolific long-standing position holders with inbred descendants" --Toady One |36="There was a typo in the siegers' campfire code. When the fires went out, so did the game." --Toady One |37="Hey, what does that flashing red and orange text mean? What? Why is there smoke everywhere? Oh god, are those BABIES on fire?" --StrawberryBunny |38="It's never 'just a game' when you're losing."
--George Carlin (if he played Dwarf Fortress) |39=Not that building a bridge out of soap makes much sense to begin with anyway. |40=Note that while you cannot milk larger animals yourself, civilizations can still milk animals "off screen" for your benefit. |41=Tosid Idenarzes likes tentacle demons for their corrupt intentions. "There! Now we've covered all of the seven deadly sins." |42="Litast Idenudesh, baby, is throwing a tantrum! Inod Litastrilem, Mayor, has lost consciousness. Inod Litastrilem, Mayor, has bled to death." |43="Known bug #780: Town guard becomes a criminal after getting an adventurer's stolen weapon stuck in his body." |44="Udib Toblumaid, Axedwarf, cancels sparring in Barracks: too insane." Ben jamm1n |45=Kosoth Cilobonol, Bone Carver cancels Drink: Unconscious. |46=Sizir the Snail of Bait is a deity of The Fresh Towers. Sizir most often takes the form of a female dwarf and is associated with jealousy. |47=Sibrek Tanbim likes Limestone, Tin, Smoky Quartz, the color crimson, bolts, scepters, anvils, and rock blocks for their lack of quality levels. |48=Most vermin teleport, so nothing actually contains them. -Fuzzy |49=There are 5 articles in category Lore: Armok, Cave Adaptation, Elephant, Philosopher, and Vomit. |50=There is nothing to catch in the magma pipe. |51=Bug #563: mayor ordered himself beaten for failing to make crystal glass objects |52=If cow cheese is made from cow's milk, what is dwarven cheese made of? |53=Bugs are opportunities to cause unprecedented amounts of destruction. --Zorgn |54="You know, Urist, you've got a mind like an +Ash Trap+."--Destor |55=Zander J: "Is there a way to stop immigration without setting the population cap?"
Yanlin: "Magma." |56=An animal trainer just suddenly stopped working and hid himself in a workshop. He's probably going to make a wardog out of rock and goblin skulls. |57=Bug #597: Flying creatures give birth in midair, leading to tragedy. |58=Urdim Kutamèrith, Pump Operator, has created Rakusttenshed, a Glumprong blowgun!
Urdim, you are a freaking idiot. |59=<Forkez> I don't get the game, but I do get that tunnels flooded with water is a bad thing. |60="If you give a dwarf a fire, he will be warm for a night. If you set a dwarf on fire, he will be warm for the rest of his life." |61="Since the Elves said they won't let me cut down any trees, I bought 50 of their logs instead." |62=Do not make a trading race that breathes fire.

I REPEAT, DON'T!! EVER!! |63=Dwarf Fortress: Because burning elves are funny. |64=The carp has drowned. |65=There's one thing a dwarf needs, and that's stones. And alcohol... and magma... but mainly stones. |66="I swear to god once I saw a dwarf who was labeled as being Strong, Very Agile, Very Tough... and Clean. But it was probably just a bad dream." |67=Urist McRandy has been ecstatic lately. He brought somebody to bed lately. |68="Dwarven children kidnapped and incorporated into goblin society might sh... shave."
--Toady One |69=Bug #871: babies fall to death when born on stairs |70=Bug #1031: a merchant pack animal caught at an old dwarf site during adv mode was wearing a full set of clothes |71="Magma solves everything. Fire just ruins the booze." -sonerohi |72=You can't yet strangle people with the exposed guts, though I suppose that's now within reach. --Toady One |73=Look, there are roving clumps of sentient lava outside, ... This isn't going to get better. --PTTG?? |74=...and the only surviving dwarf is a noble who has mandated the construction of crowns and clear glass items to the empty halls. --PTTG?? |75=Adil Idenlocun is conflicted: "When possible he prefers to consume purring maggot, Dwarven ale and Dwarven syrup. He absolutely detests purring maggots." |76="I had to leave just before I tested the dwarf with the boiling gold blood." -- Toady the Great One |77=Urdim Zatinod has been quite content lately. She has lost an annoying friend to tragedy lately. |78=I added two levers. One opens the magma. The other sets free all the cats. --Someone in Headshoots |79="As Manbaspecut, Human Merchant is stricken by melancholy!" "Muskox has gone stark raving mad!" I think something is wrong with the human caravan... |80="Somebody needs to build an active volcano inside a fortress inside an active volcano." --Boksi |81=It has stats. It can be killed. |82=Bug #432: Bones pop out of coffins. |83=Thanks. I wish I had known that about three forts ago. |84=If I remembered what the fucking lever did, I'd pull it! <...pulls lever anyway...> |85=Sarvesh Ralrubal likes olivine, olivine and olivine. |86="So let me get this straight. We managed to destroy a dwarven civilization while only managing a single town??" |87=Kara Mase, the Glory of Amusing: Engraved on the wall is an image of a dwarf and an elf. The dwarf is committing a depraved act on the elf. |88=Once saw a water skin with red beryl spikes. I still wonder how you would drink from that. |89=Watching a kobold thief be chased by batman is very satisfying. |90=Kol Tölunimush has been ecstatic lately. He killed somebody by accident while sparring recently. He took joy in slaughter lately. He has lost a lover to tragedy lately. He has witnessed death. He had a satisfying sparring session recently. |91=You haven't embarked on a quest - you've joined a religion. --Quietust |92=The alert statuses (i.e., "Stay Indoors") have been entirely redone. You may set several custom alerts with user defined scheduling. |93=There was kind of a violent explosion of boiling human blood when I was testing a human vs a magma man in the arena... it was a little weird, but I guess that's okay. --Toady One |94=Mew?
Chop! |95="If Dwarf Fortress geology is to be believed, then the Earth's core is made of microline and demons." |96='They're firing arrows at us! Quickly! Raise the babies!!' -Urdim McSquadLeader, mother of 8 |97=It started raining, then all my dwarves outside started bleeding to death. On inspection their upper bodies were missing. |98=It seems that a fresh recruit given a crossbow and a quiver with ammo in it will opt to run up to the enemy and bash them with the crossbow. |99=Bug introduced in the latest version: Firemen can have their flames severed. These flames then just lie around the place. |100=You stab Iron Man in the right leg from behind with your adamantine short sword, breaking away a piece of the gas and shattering the iron!
The Beak Dog is caught in a burst of Iron Man gas!
Beak Dog vomits into the Iron Man gas. |101=Urist McDairy, Milker cancels store item in stockpile: handling dangerous creature |102=Ildomushat, Fish Cleaner, cancels Clean Self: Could not find path. |103=Losing is Fun!!!
--The Motto of Dwarf Fortress |104=I hate walking under dwarven archways. You never know how many mechanized crossbows they have hidden underneath those damn things. |105="bibo ergo sum, I drink, therefore I am."
-- Dwarven Philosopher |106=This is a menacing iron spike. This object menaces with spikes of iron. |107=Kogsak is a deity of The Helpful Diamond. Kogsak most often takes the form of a dwarf and is associated with fortresses. |108=The Forgotten Beast pushes The Wrestler in the head, bruising the muscle, driving the skull through the brain, and tearing apart the brain! The Wrestler has been struck down! |109=Goblin Chops at the Diagnostician in the right leg, damaging the muscle! Urist McHouse is Unconscious! |110=Limul Itebdesis, trader has been Possessed. Limul Itebdesis, trader has created Stodir Isethlolor, a Mortgage-Backed Security! |111=The heart wound ended up being a guy getting shot in the arm, dropping his crossbow, running over to the opposing line, and jabbing his stack of bolts into somebody's chest. |112=Giant mole has stolen a preserved prepared giant mole lung!
"Hey, I want my grandfather back!" |113="You must construct additional barrels!" - User:Speed112 |114=All I want is a major river next to a volcano with flux, sand and bituminous coal. |115=Do not taunt magma. |116=I bury my pets in gold coffins and my nobles in wood coffins. Pets before people, I say.--KingAuggie |117=[the cavern] is basically like the surface, except underground |118=The fortress' randomly generated name was "Greatestfailure". |119="You stab the Human Thresher in the mouth with your large copper dagger, tearing the left cheek!" "The large copper dagger has lodged firmly in the wound!" |120=Having to much stone is a problem to put it somewhere.Having no stone means you can't do anything.